


Growth

by 12AngryHighlanders



Series: Growth [1]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, Bumblebee - Freeform, Bumbleby - Freeform, Canon Compliant through Volume 5, Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Smut, White Rose - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2019-01-25
Packaged: 2019-04-19 04:50:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14229639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/12AngryHighlanders/pseuds/12AngryHighlanders
Summary: Team RWBY is finally reunited after the battle at Haven Academy, but emotions are running high and there are issues that remain very unresolved - particularly between a certain blonde and her Faunus partner.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I've only written one fic before; "Hold Nothing Back," set after Volume Four. This fic has a lot of the same trappings and themes - switching viewpoints, personal relationships rather than plot, just talking things out because people don't do that enough - but I wanted to try some new things with it, it's now compliant with everything we currently know, and most importantly, there's a while before the next volume so this can be an actual series. Fair warning, I don't like shying away from any aspect of relationships, so there will be some explicit stuff later on. Tags added as necessary. Enjoy!

“Yang?”

The blonde looked up from her workbench at the sound of her partner’s voice, giving a half turn and nodding.

“Hey, Blake. What’s up?”

Blake took a deep breath. “Yang, can we talk?”

A shrug from Yang. “Sure, as long as you don’t mind me doing some maintenance on my arm.”

Blake’s eyes darted to Yang’s side – she hadn’t noticed that the mechanical limb wasn’t attached. “Of course. I didn’t know it needed maintenance.”

“It actually doesn’t. Top of the line Atlas tech, thing basically takes care of itself. But after Haven, I want to be positive nothing’s damaged. Besides, it’s kind of calming, you know?”

“Yeah, um…” Come on, Blake, you’ve wasted enough time. Say it. “Yang? Do you want me here?” Her emphasis left no question that she was talking about more than just being in the room. Yang’s back stiffened, and Blake’s ears picked up her mutter more distinctly than a human’s could have: “That’s less calming.”

But when her partner shot a glance over her shoulder at her, she was smiling, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“What? Of course! Team RWBY’s back together!”

Wrong thing to say. Blake felt a spike of irritation. “I’m not asking about the team, Yang! I’m asking about us! You and me!” She checked herself, wincing inwardly – that had been a lot louder than she’d intended. Yang didn’t seem to react; it was as if her partner didn’t even notice. But her voice was steely as she responded without looking.

“There is no ‘us,’ Blake. You made that pretty clear.” Okay. That hurt…more than Blake had been expecting, or cared to admit. But she’d thought something like that might happen, so she took a steadying breath, but Yang was already speaking again. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I’ve tried to be less…myself, lately. I don’t always do a good job.”

“No, it’s…I get it. What, uh, what does that mean? Trying to be less yourself?” The unasked third question lingered in her head, but she held it back: “Why would anyone want to be less like you?”

Her partner’s voice was too measured, too steady, not to have been carefully controlled. Even then, a bit of venom slipped through. “Because in case you haven’t noticed, being myself didn’t exactly work out for me. All of Remnant thought I attacked an injured man. I lost an arm. My…my best friend ran from me. I even pushed Ruby away. And that’s just the recent stuff.” She shook her head. “Thinking things through was never my strong suit. I’m trying to change that.”

Blake tried not to stare. For the first time since their reunion, she wondered if Yang wasn’t just being different around her – maybe she was different, and maybe not for the better. Suddenly, Blake felt a flush of shame. It wasn’t fair of her to expect that everything would just go back to normal. She’d changed. And thinking about it, Weiss seemed gentler, Ruby more mature. But Yang had always been the unquenchable fire. Now her familiar warmth felt more like…

Ashes.

Blake rammed the thought aside as she felt her stomach drop, mouth suddenly dry. She took a breath. Let it out slow. One thing at a time. She couldn’t help if Yang wouldn’t talk to her. So the faunus pushed forward. “You never answered my question.”

The blonde’s shoulders slumped. Whatever frustration – at Blake or herself – had been there, seemed to leave her, replaced by resignation as she reattached her arm. But she still didn’t turn around, and when she spoke, her voice was quiet.

“What do you want me to say, Blake?”

“I want you to say that you’re glad to have me back. Or…that you’re not.”

And now she turned towards the faunus, eyes sad, but not tearful. She leant back against the bench, and forced her eyes up to meet Blake’s.

“It’s not that simple.”

Blake scoffed a little in disbelief. “Why not? I haven’t seen you in months, you say you’re glad we’re all here together, but you’ve barely said a word to me since Haven. You act all cheerful but I’m not an idiot, Yang. Everyone else, you’re normal around. You arm wrestle with Nora, play games with Qrow, every minute Ruby doesn’t spend with alone with Weiss you’re with one of them. But you hardly look at me, Yang, and they all know it! Even Sun thinks something’s wrong, and he’s not exactly always the most sensitive about how other people feel.”

For a single moment, Blake was shocked to see Yang’s eyes blaze red, and there was a cracking sound. Yang was gripping the bench behind her hard enough to break. The red eyes closed, and after a few long moments and deep breaths, lilac ones opened.

“Blake…please. Don’t do this.”

“Don’t do what?” Dust, she couldn’t keep the impatience out her voice. Every word was a little louder and a lot sharper than she intended. “You won’t even tell me enough for me to know!”

The blonde’s shoulders slumped, exhaustion in her voice. “Don’t ask me questions I can’t answer. I…I need to be alone for a little while. I’m sorry.” She turned back to face the workbench, now devoid of anything to work on.

Both sets of Blake’s ears burned, although out of hurt or anger, she couldn’t say. She took a step back, then turned to walk away. She was surprised to feel the drop of water on her hand, and even more surprised to find it had fallen from her own eye, soon joined by another. She didn’t know when she’d started crying.

Her sensitive ears picked up the sound of sniffling. But if it was from herself or Yang, she was too upset to tell.

\--------------------------

Blake didn’t know who she passed along the way, if anyone. But she knew where she was going, and before long found herself knocking on Ruby’s door. There was some hurried scrambling from inside, and then it swung open. To Blake’s surprise, though perhaps it shouldn’t’ve been, it was Weiss on the other side. Ruby was sitting on the bed behind her, refastening her cloak around her neck. The heiress – former heiress, she corrected herself – looked for a moment as irritated with Blake as she’d been with Ruby on their first day, but before she could let out a scathing rebuke, she saw Blake’s face. She let out a small grunt, and then, almost as fast as their team leader could’ve managed, a vice-like grip closed around Blake’s wrist and she was yanked inside, the door slamming behind her.

“I’m sorry, I…didn’t realize you two were busy. I can come back -”

“Hush. You need us, we’re here. Sit down, you’re a mess.” As Weiss pushed the faunus gently onto the bed, where Ruby gave her a small smile and a squeeze of her shoulder, she half-laughed, half-sobbed. Weiss’ bossy, critical attitude had developed into an almost maternal fussiness around her teammates. Blake wiped her eyes.

“Thanks. I’m sorry, it’s just…it’s Yang. You know how she’s been around me. I tried to talk to her about it, and…” She trailed off, stifling another sob, but it escaped her as she met Ruby’s gaze. She felt her fist clench, and with sheer force of will, she got herself under control. She wasn’t composed, not by half, but she was crying out of hurt, confusion, frustration, unsureness – and all of those she could handle. Taking a deep, slightly shaky breath, she began to relate her conversation with Yang, such as it was. Her tears kept falling, but her voice only cracked once, and when she finished, looking up from her knees, it was to see the other two exchanging a long look. Ruby spoke first.

“Are you sure I shouldn’t -”

“No, Ruby, we talked about this. I know it’s hard, but this is the right way to do it, you know that.”

The young leader sighed. “Yeah. Just…” She trailed off, either not knowing what she wanted to say or unable to finish saying it, and Weiss pulled her into a gentle hug.

“I will.”

And with that, she left, leaving Ruby and Blake alone. There was a silence, Blake looking at Ruby in confusion, but it didn’t last long.

“We, um, kinda figured this would happen. Weiss is going to talk to Yang. I know you said she wants to be alone, but that’s probably not a good idea right now.” She shook her head. “Blake, I’m not. Um. Great. With people. About stuff like this. But, I do know Yang better than anyone, and…I want to help.”

The faunus gave her a watery smile. “Thank you.” A pause. “I just don’t know why she won’t talk to me. She always used to – to the point that it was annoying!”

Ruby nodded, smiling sadly. “I know what you mean. Since we were little she was always watching me, making me talk to her when things were wrong, making sure I could tell her everything. When we got to Beacon, she just kind of decided that now she was looking after all of us. She’s always taken care of people. Even when maybe they didn’t want it.” Ruby gave a rueful laugh, and Blake couldn’t help but smile, remembering that day in the library. Yes, Yang always had been more concerned with solving problems than sparing feelings.

“Exactly. I thought she’d be mad, that she’d…she’d yell at me, or we’d fight, or something, it just…it never occurred to me that she wouldn’t say anything at all.”

“It isn’t like her,” Ruby hesitated, clearly uncomfortable. “But…a lot of what she does isn’t like her. She acts normal when she can, but it doesn’t feel normal.”

Blake’s faunus ears drooped slightly, her voice quiet as her eyes filled with fresh tears. “Ruby, did I – did I make her this way?”

“Blake, no. Look, you didn’t, um, help, but there’s more to it than that. So much has happened. With her arm, and with Raven, and that’s just the personal stuff, never mind all the ‘world-ending-catastrophe’ business, so…I guess she’s just going through a lot?” She finished lamely. It was more than a bit of an understatement, but Blake did feel a little better, knowing she wasn’t the sole cause of her partner’s unhappiness. “None of us can fix all the other stuff. Just try and help with the parts about you?”

That made sense. And truth be told, it seemed way more manageable than what she’d been facing before. Except for one, glaring problem.

“I just don’t know what to say to her, Ruby.”

Ruby cocked her head, perking up at the thought of a solvable problem. “Well, we can work it out together! Let’s start at the beginning. What did you say after you apologized?”

Blake blinked. “What?”

Ruby seemed puzzled at Blake’s confusion. “After you said you were sorry for leaving her. What did you -” She stopped suddenly, a look of confused disbelief crossing her features. “Blake. Did you say you were sorry?”

Blake shook her head. She didn’t want to do this. There’d been one thing she’d needed to apologize for, and she had, crying on the ground at Beacon, reaching for Yang, saying it over and over. She tried to explain calmly, but firmly. “Ruby…I had to leave. And it was the right thing to do. We saved Menagerie, we stopped the White Fang!”

At first, the younger girl’s confusion just grew. But after a moment, her eyes narrowed slightly.

“Maybe. But maybe there was a better way.” Ruby’s voice wasn’t hard, not quite. But there was a determination in it that was clearly vying for control against her compassion. “And even if there wasn’t, you don’t think you should’ve said goodbye? At least tried to help? And after all that you didn’t even say you were sorry?” Ruby’s voice was louder, as if she couldn’t comprehend the injustice of it, and her determination was replaced by anger – no, pain. The pain of someone she loved, felt so deeply that it was her own. But as unlike Ruby as this confrontation was, Blake wasn’t willing to back down. She felt her frustration, so carefully kept in check and eased by her teammates, boil over.

“She was in danger! Everything I cared about was! As long as Adam and the White Fang were out there, I had to get away, to keep her safe!”

“Bullshit.” And that stopped Blake in her tracks. Ruby never swore. Never. “You had to keep everything you cared about safe by running away from it, so you went to your home and your parents? How would that keep them safe? And then you took Sun with you?”

“I didn’t take him, he followed me!”

“And you think that makes a difference? Yang couldn’t follow you, she didn’t know where you were, she was hurt, inside and out. The truth is, you didn’t trust her – trust us – to help with the White Fang, you never have! You left her because you were scared and didn’t think she could handle it!”

Blake’s amber eyes blazed. “You don’t get to tell me how I felt, Ruby! You don’t know what it was like, the decisions I had to make! How dare you say I -”

“Because I left her, too!”

There it was, the first real, genuine yell of the day. And it wasn’t angry. It was desperate. “I left her, Blake. All she did was stay in bed, she wouldn’t eat, barely spoke. I tried to help her. I had no idea how, but I tried. And I failed, Blake. When…when my mom died, Yang grew up overnight. She kept me safe and made me happy and took care of me. And I couldn’t do the same for her. And I left anyway. Just like Raven. Just like Mom. Just like Dad. And just like you. Every single person she cared about left, Blake. And she forgave all of us. At least, all the ones who actually admitted we needed forgiveness. Even if we did what we thought was right…or the only thing we felt like we could.” Ruby’s eyes drifted downwards. “I told her I loved her. She didn’t say anything. That was the last time I spoke to her until she came through that portal. You have no idea what that felt like. Not just because it hurt, but because she used to say that more easily than anyone I knew, like she didn’t even consider that someone wouldn’t say it back. I never thought I’d see her like that. And I definitely didn’t think that she ever wouldn’t say she loved me back. She messed up, too, Blake. But after everything…can you blame her? I couldn’t. I know you want things to be normal, to just move on like none of these past few months ever happened, but we can’t. She can’t.”

Blake sat for a long moment, the torrent of words washing over her. When she spoke, it was soft. “I know. And I know I hurt her. But, Ruby…my parents are alive. Menagerie is safe. The White Fang is gone. I just can’t be sorry for what I did, if that’s what it led to.”

Ruby sighed, as if wondering how her teammate could be this dense. A small, internal part of Blake was offended by it, but a much larger part was just surprised – after all, Ruby was usually the one on the receiving end of that sigh, most often from her girlfriend. “Blake, you don’t have to be sorry for what you did. You just have to show that you’re sorry it hurt her when you did it. I don’t think she feels like she matters to you very much.” Blake felt her eyes widen as the hurt spread through her. “I know she does, but you’ve…never been the most up front with your emotions? If you know what I mean? And before, Yang could always push past that, but...she can’t now.” Ruby’s head fell into her hands, her voice quivering. “I’m so worried about her, Blake. She’s so different, so closed off, so much like -” Her head lifted just as quickly as it had fallen, a confused frown clouding her features. “So much like Weiss when we first met her. I don’t know what made me think of that.”

When it came to her sister, Ruby was always insightful. But that particular comparison hit Blake hard. She’d run from Weiss. And when they met again, it was only Weiss’ understanding and acceptance that had made things better. But Blake had never really apologized to Weiss, either. Just came back, hoped for the best, and things went on. I guess expecting it to happen twice is a bit unrealistic, she thought bitterly. She sighed, and stood, folding Ruby into a hug.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured, testing out the words she’d say to her partner later. “To all of you. And extra for hurting your sister. But I don’t think she wants to talk to me. She wouldn’t say anything. Even if I apologize…what if it doesn’t change anything?”

Ruby squeezed her hard. “Well…she learned hiding her emotions from Weiss, and brooding from you…maybe you just have to learn how to completely ignore what people want and just do what’s best for them instead from her?”

Blake laughed. It was a little choked, but genuine. “Keep pushing. Got it.”

Ruby pulled away to arm’s length, smiling. “And don’t stop until you break through. Even if she pushes back.” Her smile faded, and she looked at Blake seriously. “Yang only ever lied to me one time, Blake - when she told me she didn’t care where you were. You matter to her, just…help her know she matters, too.” A moment’s hesitation, and then: “And like I said, it isn’t all you, either. She’s not okay. But I know she’d get better faster if you were there to help.”

Blake’s nod was as solemn a promise as any she’d ever made.

“I want to be.”


	2. Chapter 2

“I said I needed to be alone, Blake. I’m sorry.”

“Please, leaving people alone is something Blake is irritatingly good at. I, however, am quite skilled at the opposite.”

Yang turned, surprised. “Weiss? Hey, what’s up?” she said, quickly smiling and hoping her unshed tears weren’t visible.

“Can it, Xiao Long. We’re having a conversation, non-negotiable.” And before Yang could figure out if she was befuddled or pissed off, Weiss had pushed her onto a stool and found one for herself. “I’ll start, okay?” Weiss Schnee, the girl sitting with perfect posture in an elegant dress on a wobbly stool in a filthy garage, began:

“Blake’s an idiot.”

Whatever Yang had been expecting in the few moments she’d had to compose herself, that wasn’t it.

“Um, what?”

“You heard me. Yang, we’re worried about you. Ruby talks about it in her sleep. And there are some pretty important conversations we need to have. But you and I both know, even if you won’t admit it, that none of that is going to get resolved until you vent about Blake. So,” she said, somehow sitting up even straighter, “dish.”

The command was so simultaneously imperious and ludicrous that Yang wanted to laugh. She almost did, but for some reason, stopped herself. Her smile was gone, but she waved her friend off all the same. “Weiss, it’s fine. It’s just weird having her back. Things will go back to normal.”

“Yang, _you’re_ not normal. You’re closed off from everyone, even when you’re doing things that should be completely natural. You act like nothing bothers you when it clearly does. You won’t let yourself enjoy anything. You won’t open yourself up to saying how you feel because it’s like you think it’ll make you weak or something. Dust, you’re being such a…such a _me!_ ” She huffed, crossing her arms, as though there was no greater condemnation. Yang just shrugged.

“You wanna break that down for me?”

“That’s exactly what I mean! You know damn well what I’m talking about, Yang. I was the worst. I’m amazed you all put up with me as long as you did. But you did more than that; you helped me. You made me a better person. I was broken, Yang. And so are you. But you helped fix me. And now, even after being disowned, even with Salem breathing down our necks, I wouldn’t trade my life for anything. So stop being deliberately obtuse, you oaf, and let me make you feel better!”

Yang shifted uncomfortably. Weiss was just giving voice to a part of herself that she’d been consistently pushing down, but hearing it out loud and from someone else made it more difficult to ignore. But it was worth a shot anyway.

“It’s not like that. I’m not shutting anyone out, I’m just…being cautious.” She replied lamely. _Well, Ice Queen isn’t going to let that one slide_.

She did not.

“Being _cautious_? Yang, just because you learned how to fight better by being more reserved doesn’t mean you should apply that to your entire life!”

“Why not?” _Good job, Yang. Really nailing these comebacks._

“For about a million reasons, but right now, because I’ve been where you are and I know you better than that. So, I’m only going to ask one more time, because you will tell me when I do: Blake.”

Myrtenaster’s point had nothing on Weiss’ eyes. Those bright blue eyes. They reminded her of the relic, now safe with Qrow. And that slight connection was all it took to bring her back to the vault, weeping on the ground as her mother abandoned her again. Suddenly, she was tired. So damn tired. And she just couldn’t fight any more. Her eyes squeezed shut, and though she didn’t sob, a few tears escaped their prison all the same as she whispered.

“Why is she so _stupid_?”

Her head shot up at the sudden and horrifying screech, adrenaline instantly up – but it wasn’t a fight brewing, just Weiss dragging her rusted stool across the ground so she was close enough to hug Yang.

“That’s better. Talk to me.” She pulled away, giving Yang some space, but gave her hand a squeeze before she let go. She was there if Yang needed her.

And she really, really did.

“It’s just…it’s like I’m not mad at her, but I’m also _furious_ with her. How can she not get why it hurt so much? Even if…” Yang swallowed. They’d talked once before, the three of them, about Blake’s absence. And when they’d finished, Yang had held Weiss back a moment. For some reason, she couldn’t tell Ruby, but she’d needed someone to know. To understand. But she hadn’t said the words out loud since Blake got back, and they stuck in her throat. Weiss was patient, and gave her a small nod. “…even if I didn’t feel the way I do about her, shouldn’t she be able to understand why it’d be hard to let her back in? And she had Sun with her the whole time, and dust only knows what happened between them, and -” She cut herself off as her voice got louder, uncontrolled, not wanting to take those thoughts any further. She let her anger and anxiety flow in another direction instead. “I do want things to go back to normal, Weiss, but I don’t know how they can. I’m not talking about the world, or Salem, just normal between us. But no matter what I do, it doesn’t work, I’m just not that person anymore!” She bit the last word off, slamming her fist on her leg.

“ _Shit!_ ” she grabbed at the sore spot, her left hand going to it for the sweet and slightly painful release of pressure. “I forgot about this fucking robot arm again!”

Weiss raised an eyebrow, clearly trying not to laugh. She’d seen Yang have this realization a few times, and Yang suspected it never got old for her. She sighed. In her opinion, it was funnier when she just accidentally broke a plate, or a lamp, or a couch that one time, but it’s not like she didn’t understand the appeal of a little slapstick.

“Yang…” Weiss’ eyes were gentle, her voice soft. There was even a small smile across her pale lips. “You’re right, you aren’t that person. But that doesn’t mean that you have to lose everything the old you had. We aren’t just supposed to change, Yang – we’re supposed to grow. Take it from me, please…it’s okay to let yourself feel things. Even if it hurts.” She nodded to Yang’s leg. “Sometimes especially if it hurts. Do you ever regret losing your arm?”

“Never.” Yang was surprised at how swift and firm her answer was. “I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

“Because?”

Yang sighed. “Because I care about Blake. Because I’d have given more than this to keep her safe.”

“Exactly. It hurt you, so much. But you did it because you love her. And if you really don’t regret it, you’ve already decided; that love is worth the pain it causes. Trust me, love isn’t about someone who will never hurt you – it’s about someone who’s worth getting hurt for sometimes.”

Those words echoed in Yang’s head for a long time. When she finally was able to speak, she muttered, hating how selfish it sounded: “But why am I always the one getting hurt?”

To her surprise, Weiss didn’t call her out on her self-pity. She just shrugged. “It’s a mix. Partly because you got dealt a difficult hand. And partly because most of the rest of us aren’t honest enough with our emotions to make ourselves vulnerable the way you always did. But that vulnerability takes a lot more strength than shutting everything out does, Yang. That’s why you were always the strong one – for Ruby, for Blake, and for me.”

Yang took a steadying breath, laughing a little – and crying a little. It felt good not to fight it. “You know, for someone who used to be pretty harsh, you’ve gotten really good at this.”

Weiss huffed a little, clearly flustered. “Yes. Well. When I first started realizing my feelings for Ruby, after my father took me home, I was determined that if I got the chance to be with her, I wouldn’t screw it up. So I had Klein bring me a few books on psychology and couples therapy. And intimacy issues. And dealing with grief and trauma. And how to be your best self. And the difference between being selfish and taking care of yourself. And understanding your sexuality. And coming to terms with change. And…some other stuff. It’s not important. What matters is that Ruby and I have known this was going to come to a head eventually, and thanks to my previous preparation, I was very well-placed to help. I can provide my list of citations if you want them.”

Dust, that was _so_ Weiss. Even had to study for a relationship. Which begged the question…

“Weiss? What ‘other stuff’?”

Weiss flushed red and mumbled something utterly unintelligible. Yang felt a small spark of enjoyment, the sort of thing that would’ve given her endless hours of entertainment before. She grabbed at it, like a child reaching for a firefly, not letting the light get away. Of course, that manifested in a slightly less poetic way.

“So…it was a sex thing, huh?”

“I didn’t know how two women had intercourse, okay!” The ex-heiress basically yelled into Yang’s face. And as she laughed, she felt some of the weight slide of her shoulders, and before she knew it her laughter had turned to tears. Deep, wracking sobs, letting emotion flow out of her, crying less out of sadness more out of sheer relief that she didn’t have to hide her problems from at least one person anymore. Weiss said nothing; she just held Yang, and waited. When the blonde was finished, uncounted minutes later, she smiled. The first one in ages that didn’t feel forced.

“Thanks, Weiss.”

“Yang, of course.” Her eyes were kind. “Ruby and I are dating, but you? You’re my best friend. I’m always here for you.”

Yang almost hated to ruin the moment.

“Not that. For making sure you knew how to show my sister a good time!” It was weak, as far as classic Yang jokes went. But it was enough to get Weiss blushing again, so she’d count it as a win.

“You absolute cretin!”

Yang laughed again, and soon Weiss joined her. When it died down, Yang just sighed.

“I’m glad, you know. That you know how I feel about her.”

“I was a little surprised you do,” the heiress said archly. “You were always so uncharacteristically subtle about it that I just assumed for a long time that you were oblivious.”

“I was going to say something, at the dance. But then she came in with Sun, and…” Yang trailed off, eyes staring past Weiss and into the distance, who patted her hand sympathetically.

“I know. Seeing them together must’ve hurt. It’s hard to -” But then Weiss seemed to realize that Yang wasn’t just gazing into the past – she was gazing at the doorway.

In which Blake Belladonna stood.

Weiss turned back, gripping Yang’s hand fervently. “Yang, if it’s too soon, you can take some time, we can talk more -”

“I’ll be okay. Really. I have to do this before I have time to think about it.” The words were so antithetical to who she’d been trying to be lately, but although Yang was far from an expert on any of this, part of her remembered knowing when you needed to leap before you looked. And then Yang was hugging Weiss. “Thank you. I’ll say more later, but for now, just…thank you.” Weiss nodded as she stood.

“Any time. If you need me, you know where to find me.” She turned, moving past Blake and into the main rooms as she muttered, “Dust knows we’ve been in this house long enough.” And the door closed behind her.

There was an uncomfortable moment. But Yang knew what she had to do. She took a deep breath –

But Blake was already speaking.

“Yang, I know you said you needed space, but this can’t wait. I’m sorry. For a lot of things. For leaving you. For not saying goodbye. For not doing anything to show you how grateful I am. Not just for saving my life, but for helping me make a life worth saving in the first place. But mostly I’m sorry that I haven’t shown you that you’re important to me, that I’ve let this wait so long since I came back. It should’ve been the first thing I said. But I was afraid, so I didn’t say anything, and I’m sorry. I thought I was done running, but then I ran from this, without even meaning to. But not anymore. So, I don’t care how hard you think you have to be, or how angry with me you are. You’re my friend and I care about you, and I’m not going to stop until you know that. I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, but no matter what, I’m not leaving again. So go ahead, keep trying to shut me out, but I won’t let you, because when I shut you out, you never gave up on me. As long as it takes, that’s fine. I won’t stop trying.” She took a breath; Yang was honestly impressed that she hadn’t passed out. As far as she knew, Blake hadn’t strung that many words together that quickly in…possibly her entire life. There was a moment, a brief one, where she wondered if what just happened changed what she thought she needed to do. But it didn’t – and before she could question her decision again, she spoke.

“Blake, I’m in love with you.”

Silence. A long, interminable silence as Blake’s mouth hung slightly open, while Yang prepared herself for whatever came next. Eventually, Blake swallowed hard.

“Oh.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My one big concern with this piece is that it feels like it's maybe moving too fast. Partly because, hey, who wants to drag things out in a setting where time is already limited, and partly because, without Beacon, it feels like there's less to "fill the days" with, you know? But a lot of it is probably because, well, I'm writing this because the show hasn't addressed the personal relationships with the depth I hope it moves toward in the future, and I don't just mean canon Bees! ...although yes, I do mean canon Bees. Thoughts? Constructive criticism? All is appreciated!


	3. Chapter 3

“Yang, I…I don’t -”

A raised hand stopped her.

“Hey, before you say anything…I want you to know I don’t expect anything from you. I don’t know if there’s anything between you and…and Sun, and that Ilia girl seems pretty attached to you, and…you know, whether you have something or not, none of my business. But Weiss got weirdly introspective with me, and it made me realize some things, and…Blake, I’m not okay. And I won’t ever be okay if I’m hiding this from you, because I’ll spend all my time thinking about it, about you, and not about taking care of myself. So, I don’t want to put you in a bad position, and I get if this…changes things. But I needed you to know.”

Blake was trembling. Dust, she was trembling. How hadn’t she known? Adam and Sun were both obvious. Ilia was…more surprising, but not a total shock. But Yang…Yang was her best friend. She’d grown closer to Yang than she thought she could be to anyone after Adam. How did she miss it? Suddenly, Yang’s voice snapped her out of her reverie.

“Blake? You…you okay?”

How long had she been standing silent? The look of concern on her partner’s face meant it had definitely been too long. She raised a hand halfway to her mouth out of embarrassment, but clenched it into a nervous fist above her sternum.

“Oh, Yang…I’m…I’m so, so sorry, I didn’t know.”

The blonde shook her head.

“No reason you should have. And I’m sorry to just put this on you like this, I won’t say anything else unless you want to talk about it. But if you do, well…I’ll actually, you know, _talk_ this time. Like I should have before.”

Blake gave her head a slight shake, trying to clear her mind a little. “We should, we…I want to. Dust, I don’t know if anything I was going to say makes sense now. Can I…is it okay if I take a little while? To process?”

Her partner nodded. “’Course. Take your time. I’m gonna go say thanks to Weiss. I…kinda owe her.”

“I’ll come find you. And…say thanks to Ruby for me, too?”

“Sure thing.” She turned to leave. But…

“Yang?” She looked back, blonde mane framing her slightly surprised face perfectly.

“I’m…I’m not with Sun. Or Ilia.” Blake looked away, flustered, one arm rubbing the other. “I’m not saying that means…it’s just…so you don’t have to be thinking about it. Or wondering.”

Yang gave her a mute, but clearly grateful, nod, her shoulders suddenly releasing their remaining tension. Yang looked lighter as she left.

And then Blake was alone with her thoughts. Her many, many thoughts.

\--------------------------

Yang really needed to talk to Weiss. Ruby’s room it was.

She thought she’d be shaking – she felt like she should be. But she was strangely calm as she knocked. Both her teammates were there when the door opened, and she stepped past them to the bed. She sat on it, and Ruby’s eyes went wide.

“You know, we can get a chair or something! Way more comfortable, better for your posture, I’ll just grab one real quick -” Weiss held her back by the hem of her cape, sighing deeply as her free hand covered her eyes. Yang frowned, and then laughed in understanding as Weiss rolled her eyes.

“Ruby, don’t worry about the various and sundry unspeakable things you and Weiss have done to and/or on each other in this bed. It’s just a bed. And someday we’ll have to be able to talk about this stuff, you know.”

“Or not! Or we could continue to view each other as sexless, amorphous blobs for the rest of our lives!”

“Wait, that’s how you see me?”

“Um…no?”

“Okay, we need to have a conversation at some point, but no offense Rubes, I kinda have something else on my mind right now.”

“Right! Sorry. So…did Blake apologize? We kinda got into it, I hope she knows I’m not really mad at her.”

“She knows. She said I should thank you for helping.” Ruby visibly relaxed. Weiss, however, waited keenly for her next words. “Yeah, she apologized. She said she was sorry for a lot of stuff, and that she wouldn’t let me shut her out, and that she would be there for me.” Yang let out a deep, exhausted sigh. “And then I told her I was in love with her.”

Weiss audibly exhaled, saying a satisfied “finally,” even as Ruby let out her loudest possible “WHAT!?!”

“Yeah. So…that happened. She needed some time to think, so…I wanted to let you know what was going on.”

Weiss was already hugging her. “I have to say, I didn’t think you’d take such a big leap so quickly.”

“Thanks to you.” She tightened her grip on the snow-haired girl. “It’s the sort of thing I would’ve done before. Like you said…growing doesn’t mean getting rid of everything you used to be, right?” Weiss smiled at her, giving her a nod. The moment was almost one of quiet contentment. Almost.

“You are my sister! And I am your team leader! Why was I not notified of this? Why did you withhold vital information? I demand answers! Reparations must be made!”

“Ruby, dear? Let’s talk about this later?”

Ruby made a noise that could be roughly transcribed as “Gack!” as she, seemingly literally, choked back any further comments. Weiss seemed to take that as tacit agreement. “How are you feeling?”

“I dunno. This all happened so fast, you guys. Yesterday - hell, this morning, I didn’t know if I could ever really talk to Blake normally again. And then things just escalated so quickly. I feel like I should be scared, or…or something, but mostly I’m just relieved. I’ve always been bad at waiting, better at doing. The only thing I’m scared of is…” She hesitated, but got herself under control before she started to panic. “Is, so much changed so fast. What if it changes back? I haven’t…look, I know I didn’t deal with any of this well, but sometimes it feels almost fine, like nothing’s changed. And then something small sets me off and the next thing I know, I feel like I’m back on Patch, just…empty. What if I wake up tomorrow and everything that’s happened, everything I’ve let myself feel today, just goes away?”

“I mean…it might.” The small voice turned Yang and Weiss’ heads. Ruby had one hand holding the opposite arm across her chest, her brow furrowed with concern, but her uneasy posture didn’t match the surety in her eyes. “Yang, you’ve been up and down since you got here. And I remember how bad things were on Patch, so even this crazy highs-and-lows stuff is actually an improvement. Whatever you’re dealing with…I don’t think it’s the sort of thing you get over in one day. And I also don’t think any of this is fast, really, it’s just been boiling up this whole time and now, you know, kablooie,” she said, with a trademarked Ruby Rose anxious chuckle. “But at least it’s all out in the open now, right? So if it does happen, we’ll be able to help?”

Yang took a long moment, then shook her head, a soft smile on her face. “When did you grow up, Sis? Dust, sometimes I remember our first day at Beacon and it feels like a different life, y’know?” The other girls nodded, Ruby speaking softly again.

“Maybe just try not to be so hard on yourself all the time?”

Yang rubbed her temples. Ruby wasn’t wrong, but it was way easier said than done. She wanted to ask her other teammate’s opinion, but it didn’t seem like she’d get an answer; Weiss was gazing at Ruby with a mix of confidence, pride, and…was that _arousal?_ But before Yang could fully register the situation, or figure out how to either refocus the conversation or make a graceful exit, a knock on the door gave her mercy. Yang stood, setting her shoulders. _Now_ she was scared. But when she opened the door to find her partner, Blake seemed just as nervous as she was.

“So…let’s talk?”

\--------------------------

“Your room, or mine?” Yang shrugged in response.

“Doesn’t matter.” Dust, she was nervous. Blake seemed to decide on the closer of the two – Yang’s – and shut the door quietly. Yang quickly made her way to the bed, sitting with her back to the wall and her knees drawn up against her chest, arms holding them to her tightly. Blake joined her, legs crossed, slightly slouched, facing the blonde. Yang waited semi-patiently for her partner to speak, but the faunus wasn’t forthcoming. After a minute, she couldn’t handle it any more. She had to break the silence. But as she was about to open her mouth, Blake beat her to the draw.

“Yang, I really care about you. You’re my best friend, and I can’t tell you how important to me you are. The thing is, you’re special to me, I just don’t know if we’d…I mean, I’m not sure I –”

“Don’t do that.” Yang’s voice was quiet, but firm. Her chest felt heavy, her stomach leaden, but a calmer part of her was keeping the sudden, shooting despair in check. After all, it wasn’t surprising. But expecting this to happen didn’t make the reality any easier. She was surprised to find that her mechanical hand was trembling, like the phantom of her lost arm was shaking but now had an outlet, such as it was. She grabbed it with her left hand, holding it down.

“Save the whole ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ routine. It’s not like you owe me anything, and I don’t want pity. It’s okay. I wasn’t expecting you to suddenly realize you’d loved me the whole time and for things to just work out. You can tell me you don’t feel the same way – I can handle it.” She was almost sure it wasn’t a lie. Her eyes burned with the need to cry, but no tears came. _No need to make this harder for her_. She made sure to keep her gaze steady as she waited for a reply.

For her part, Blake looked nonplussed. “No, it’s not – that’s not what I meant! I mean, I guess it sort of is, but…Yang, I’m trying to say I don’t really know how I feel. This all kind of came out of nowhere for me, and I can’t figure out what’s in my head, and I’m just…” She trailed off, hugging herself, her head bowing in shame. “…I’m scared.”

Yang blinked. “Scared? Of what?”

Blake gave a small shrug, her voice not much more than a mumble. “I know things are bad for you, Yang. Like you said, you’re not okay. I told Ruby I wanted to be here for you, and I meant it. I’m scared because I don’t know how I feel, and what if…what if I hurt you trying to figure that out? What if I try to be more than a friend and something happens, and I just make things worse for you? Yang, I should be helping you, I shouldn’t even be _considering_ something like this, not when it could go so badly. It’s… _selfish_.”

Yang’s heart was racing. “Blake, what are you saying? Because if you’re saying what I think you are, then I don’t care what might happen.” She tried to calm down, not to say something to scare her partner away. “If there’s a chance you might feel the same way about me, I want to try.”

Blake shook her head. “Yang, think about it. I mean, really _think_. You’re not doing well already. Now try and imagine if this happened, if we got…close. And it fell apart. If I had to end things, or if they barely started in the first place, because I need you to understand that _I don’t know_ what will happen. All I know is that right now I’ve been away from you for so long and felt so distant since we’ve been together that being as close to you as I can _feels_ right, but it might not be! I might be confused about how I’m feeling, I might just be trying to make up for everything! Yang,” she paused, her voice pained. “I’m not going anywhere…but what if I leave you again all the same?”

Every word hammered Yang, worse than any sparring match. The truth was, Blake was right. She’d been telling Ruby and Weiss less than an hour ago about how she was afraid of what was happening, how she was doing, of what could go wrong. And whether she’d meant to or not, Blake had already caused her so much pain. So much grief. If things began to finally knit themselves back together, if she got that close to someone she’d cared so much about for so long, and it all slipped away…it would hurt. Worse than anything else had so far.

 _But Weiss was right. Some people are worth getting hurt for. This – she – is worth the risk. Any risk_.

Yang squared her shoulders. “It would mess me up, no question. I’m already broken, Blake, and this might make everything worse. But it might make things better, too. And if you want this, to try and figure out how you feel, then yeah, maybe it will be dangerous for me. But it isn’t selfish. I get to decide if it’s worth taking that chance for myself. It’s my choice.”

Blake whispered. “But what if it’s the wrong one?”

And Yang met her eyes, the calming sensation of certainty filling her. She’d used to feel this so much more. Maybe she could again. She held up her right arm, now completely steady; unshakeable, despite everything.

“You’re never the wrong choice.”

And Blake sobbed, lunging forward, wrapping her arms around Yang’s waist. The blonde hugged her back, her own tears starting to fall, and she knew she’d never be the first to let go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually ended up writing another version of the end of this chapter - one that I liked and had a lot of fun with, but just didn't fit the tone. I'm really much happier with this one, but I can't bring myself to get rid of the other one, so I'll touch it up enough to make it worth being its own (really short) thing and post it in the next few days, for those who may want something that really doesn't take itself seriously.


	4. Chapter 4

Neither of them knew how long they held each other, but by the time Blake lifted her tear-streaked face from Yang’s chest, the sun was casting its last golden rays through the window. Blake hesitantly disentangled herself from the blonde, reaching for a handful of tissues. Yang just wiped her eyes with the back of her arm. The faunus spoke first.

“So…what now?” Her churning stomach had settled into simple, periodic flips, which she was more than a little grateful for, but it was far from calm. Dust, she didn’t feel like she’d ever be calm again. _Am I doing the right thing? Could I really feel…that way about her? What if I’m offering something I can’t give because I feel guilty? Shit, what if –”_ But her brief reverie was interrupted, bringing her back to the moment.

“I don’t know. I think that has to be up to you,” Yang shifted uncomfortably. Blake felt a twinge, a sudden desire to go back to the safety of her partner’s arms. _To comfort her? Or myself?_ But Yang wasn’t done. “I mean, I don’t want to push you. And it’s not like I can promise to be, y’know, relaxed about this. I know what _I_ want, but I don’t know if you’re ready for the full-on Yang Xiao Long girlfriend experience!” Her smile was teasing, but her eyes belied her fear. She shook her head, letting out a sigh as her forced grin faded. “Damn it, even saying ‘girlfriend’ like that makes me want to kick myself, I’m sorry. This is exactly what I mean.”

Blake had to concede the point. Yang wasn’t wrong; this was new to Blake, not to her. Of course she’d be eager. _Looks like I do have some decisions to make_.

“Well,” Blake drew out the word, her brain working overtime to make sure whatever she followed it up with conveyed her thoughts properly. “Maybe for now, we just spend some time together? Just us? So I can figure out how it feels now that I know…what you’re thinking?” _What you’re thinking. Pathetic. I can’t even say how you feel about me. I’m sorry I can’t give you more. I’m sorry I’ll just be dangling myself just out of reach. I know it’s not fair, I’m sorry._

But Yang, if she felt pain at Blake’s words, didn’t show it. This time, her smile was much smaller, but completely honest. “Yeah. I’d really like that. Whatever you need.” _Dust, how can she do that? How can she be so damn considerate after everything I’ve put her through? I wish I could do more, give her what she needs. What she deserves._

 _Well…maybe I can do a_ little _more._

Slowly, Blake reached out her hand, and laid it gently over Yang’s. As lilac eyes widened, as she could feel the sudden tension tighten in her dearest friend’s body, she laced their fingers together.

“And…maybe we could be a little closer? Um…physically. You know,” she felt her face growing hot as the blush crept up her neck. _Easy, Belladonna. You can do this._ Well, she could, but she couldn’t look at Yang while she did it. Her reddening face turned away. “To see what it’s like?” She risked a peek back.

Yang nodded mutely, her eyes shining as she gazed and Blake’s hand, like she was holding a dream that could slip away at any second, bringing her back to a much harsher reality. Blake gave a small squeeze. She wasn’t used to contact like this, she hadn’t been for a long time. But…she might be able to get used to it.

\--------------------------

“Weiss, what – mmmph!” Ruby’s question didn’t make it even halfway from her mouth before Weiss was pushing her onto the bed, gripping the younger girl’s wrists and pinning them beside her head, kissing her aggressively. She didn’t pull back for a long moment, and Ruby felt herself growing lightheaded as the snow-haired girl stole her breath. Right when she was pretty sure that oxygen was an absolute necessity, Weiss’ lips released hers, and she pulled up, gasping. The former heiress’ face was flushed, her eyes filled with the same intensity that Ruby had been going to ask about. Ruby’s first, sweet breath in came out almost immediately in the form of a giggle.

“Whoa. Um…hi!” She grinned goofily up at her partner. “What’s up?”

“Ruby Rose, you are completely forbidden from being that attractive while someone else is in the room! If Blake hadn’t come in, I don’t know what I would’ve done, sister or no sister!”

Ruby was fairly sure she hadn’t been doing anything overtly attractive. One moment she was talking to Yang, the next, her teammates were barely out of the door and Weiss was devouring her. A quick attempt at retracing her steps came up with nothing, so she decided to just ask. “I mean, thanks, and I really really like this, buuuuut also I don’t get it at all?”

Weiss rose up, releasing Ruby’s hands, straddling her partner and looking down on her with smoldering eyes. Slowly, ever so slowly, she reached up, and released her hair from its ponytail. Ruby watched, mouth agape. Dust, she could _never_ get over watching her partner do that, all the more because it didn’t happen often! Ruby was in _love_ with Weiss’ hair – as well of the rest of her, but, come on! Look at it! Weiss gave a gentle toss of her head, and suddenly her hair was cascading down around her shoulders, somehow parting perfectly at her arms so that half of it covered her back and the other half covered her breasts.

Imagine if it were _only_ her hair covering her breasts…

Ruby gulped.

“Ruby,” she said, her voice deliberate and perfectly articulated. “You have always been the kindest, most generous, and unquestionably _good_ person I have ever known.” She unclasped her sapphire broach, shrugging out her… _top…shawl…thingy? I really need to ask what to call that…_ leaving her arms and back bare. Her dress and petticoat, a perfectly respectable outfit on anyone else, looked almost scandalous on the high-society girl on top of Ruby. “But being that level of _emotionally intelligent_ ,” she said, sex absolutely dripping off those last two words, “is something else entirely. Now. You’re going to get undressed. Lie right back down in on this bed. And I’m going to make you bite your hand to stop from screaming. Any questions?”

And Ruby couldn’t hold it in anymore. She giggled. And then with almost no warning, it became a full-on laugh, tears in her eyes, the absolute funniest thing she’d ever been a part of. Weiss looked confused, then mortified – and then angry. Dust, she was sexy when she was angry. Her voice was absolutely frigid.

“I’m sorry? Is something about the situation amusing to you?”

Ruby nodded, laughing too hard to answer right away. “Weiss…” she croaked out, then a fresh burst of laughter drowned out any hope of continuing.

“What? Do you suddenly not want what I’m offering?”

“No! I do, I do, but…but…” And she forced herself under control, taking a deep breath. She loved this girl, this haughty, gorgeous, ridiculous girl, more than she could say. And she had to let her know. It wasn’t her partner’s aggressiveness – that was actually _incredibly_ attractive – and it wasn’t even her girlfriend’s weird turn-ons – seriously, emotional intelligence? What she had to get out was that…was that…

“Weiss, you…you left the door open!”

_“Shit!”_

And Ruby laughed even harder as Weiss practically jumped off her, slamming the door shut so hard the room shook. Good timing – Ruby was pretty sure she’d seen Jaune coming to ask what was so funny. She smiled to herself, tongue tracing over her lips where she still felt the kiss lingering. She really hoped Weiss could get over the small hiccup. She could take herself too seriously sometimes, and it would be really bad if that got in her way now. She _had_ promised that Ruby would scream, and Ruby wasn’t about to let her off the hook!


	5. Chapter 5

She might be the craziest woman on Remnant, because here she was, lying in bed with _Blake Bella-fucking-donna_ , the faunus’ head resting on her shoulder, and she was seriously considering moving. They hadn’t meant to fall asleep, they’d just been lying there, holding hands and talking, and then…well, then it was now. And Yang wanted nothing more than to stay in bed with this girl, to savor tonight when everything might go wrong tomorrow.

Except to pee.

 _Okay, Yang. Gently. Just let her slide off your shoulder, don’t wake her – eep!_ Yang’s inner monologue was interrupted by a quickly-stifled burst of laughter. She hadn’t realized one of Blake’s cat ears had been pointing up into one of Yang’s human ones. It tickled! Like her own hair sometimes did, but…different. Huh.

The cat faunus’ fingers grasped just so slightly at the human’s as they disentangled, setting Yang’s heart to fluttering. _Wait, what?_ Yang Xiao Long’s heart did not “flutter.” It beat, it pounded, even screamed after a particularly strenuous workout. But she had to admit, this was none of those. This was new. It was all new. Not for the first time today, Yang couldn’t help but feel completely unprepared.

Dating was something Yang had exactly zero experience with. It seemed to take people by surprise, especially given her old manner of dress. And yeah, she appreciated the physical form, male or female, and with her outgoing personality, she could see why people figured she’d left a long trail of broken hearts behind her. But the truth was, dating had just seemed so… _boring_. What was the point? She was living the life she wanted. No attachments but her family. The future open before her. Riding around on Bumblebee, fighting, careless of what came next. What could beat that?

Well. There were _other_ benefits to romance, but she’d never found someone she wanted badly enough for it to be worth the hassle. Besides, the day Yang Xiao Long needed someone else’s help to get herself off was the day she’d get a vibrating attachment for her new arm.

 _Although, now that I think about it, why wait for that?_ She grinned impishly to herself, finally free of the beautiful but inconvenient entanglement that was her partner. As she started to leave, it occurred to her that maybe, given everything, they shouldn’t wake up in the same bed. Even as she cursed herself for thinking of it, she pulled the sheets gently over Blake, providing some small replacement for her own warmth. She could use Blake’s bed…but one look at her sleeping partner, and she knew she didn’t have the heart for that. She’d just grab the blankets and make a little nest on the floor. _Same room should be okay, right? We always did before._

But as she left the bathroom, feeling about a pound lighter and glad of it, she decided on a detour. The kitchen was right there, and she never had eaten dinner…

To her surprise, though, she didn’t have the room to herself.

“Ren?”

The man turned and smiled, sipping what smelled to be very strong tea.

“Evening. I didn’t really expect company.”

“I can go, if –”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m glad. Want to sit down?”

Yang grabbed the nearest bag of her go-to snack – a bag of beef jerky – and took a seat. “What are you doing up?”

Ren shrugged slightly. “I don’t sleep much these days. Insomnia. When I’m meditating, or need to focus, I can quiet my thoughts, but when I literally need to think nothing…” He shrugged again, taking another sip of his tea. “What about you?”

“Bathroom.” A nod from her friend, and they sat in silence for a few minutes. But a question began to percolate in Yang’s mind, and how often did they get a chance to talk privately in this house?

“Ren?” He raised an eyebrow. “You and Nora…how does it work? I mean, you’re so calm and cool all the time, you don’t find her annoying, or too loud, or just…kind of a lot to deal with?”

He smiled faintly, so small that only his close friends understood the level of genuine pleasure it conveyed. “You’re not the first to ask, and I doubt you’ll be the last. I’ll tell you – if you’ll tell me why you want to know.” His eyes were suddenly very critical, as if putting together a puzzle and determined to place the final pieces. He’d always been discerning. Yang didn’t know who they were telling what to, or even “what” it was there was to tell, but she went with her gut instinct. She trusted him.

“Okay, yeah, got me. It’s not really about you two. It’s more about me. And…Blake. And you two are so alike in a lot of ways, and Nora and I always, y’know, _clicked_ , it just feels like maybe…” she trailed off. They were different people, different relationships. On the outside there were similarities, but the more she thought about, the more it seemed liked she’d asked a stupid question. But Ren just smiled that same, small smile.

“I’ve always thought it was funny, the similarities between our teams.” _Wait, Ren found something funny?_ “Blake and I. You and Nora. Jaune and Ruby. Weiss and…”

Yang could’ve sworn the room got a little darker. She wished she hadn’t brought it up. Dust, it was still hard for her, but for Ren, it must be so much worse. She was about to apologize, when she found herself jumping a little at the sound of a fist hitting the wood of the table.

“I hate that.” His voice was soft, his eyes steel. “I hate that just saying Pyrrha’s name hurts. Like we can’t remember her, because the second we do we feel it all again. She deserves better than that.” He blinked, suddenly, as Yang reached out and took his hand, but she was glad he didn’t pull away from her.

“She does,” the blonde replied, trying to match Ren’s tone. “And she’ll get it.” Yang didn’t have the slightest clue how, or even what she meant. But Ren seemed to lose some of his tension, like just hearing the comforting words mattered more than their meaning. He took a breath, squeezing Yang’s hand, and his face relaxed, the smile back.

“I can’t tell you what will happen with you and Blake. But I can promise that I love Nora because of who she is, not in spite of it. And if there’s something between you two, then it’s there because of who _you_ are. I can’t imagine Blake would want to change that. If she wanted to be with someone more like her, I was right there.” Yang snorted, any sense of jealousy completely absent, even her irrational side unable to imagine it.

“Not if she also wanted her legs intact. Nora would _not_ have been kind.”

He chuckled, and very gently, put a hand on her shoulder. “Get some sleep, Yang. Thank you for the company.”

She nodded gratefully. “I really should, thanks. And thank you for talking.” She sealed what remained of her jerky and went to grab the necessary provisions for a makeshift bed. Just before she entered her room, she frowned, and returned to the young man. “Ren? What about you? You gonna be okay being up by yourself?”

He looked almost like Ozpin for a moment, clad in green, holding his mug, looking serenely out at the pitch-black night. It was just after one in the morning, nothing to be seen, but he gazed out like he had the world before him.

“I’ll be all right. I don’t think I’ll get much sleep tonight. In fact,” he said – a little sadly, but smiling all the same, the very definition of wistful, “I think I’d like to watch the sunrise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit on the short side, like the last one, but they just really felt like discrete sections to me. I'm hoping most chapters will be slightly longer form!


	6. Chapter 6

Blake woke up just like she did every day, but for some reason, it felt colder than usual. _Did I push my blankets off?_ But no, she was still covered – tucked in, even. Then why –

_Oh._

Her eyes had lighted on a mane of messy blonde hair on her floor, covering the girl beneath it to the point where the blankets wrapped around the still-sleeping figure seemed redundant. As the moment drew on, consciousness returned to Blake, and with it, memory. The last image she had was of Yang, lying on her side next to Blake, eyes almost shut, murmuring the answer to some question or other, the smell of flowers and fire that always seemed to follow Yang all the more acute to her faunus nose…she must have fallen asleep around then. But the blonde was on the floor now – had she not fallen asleep? But then why didn’t she go to her own bed? _Or stay in mine?_ Blake flushed as the unbidden thought snuck to the forefront of her mind. _Does that mean I wanted her to? Or was I just wondering? Oh, dust, am I going to be analyzing every stray thought I have about Yang now?_ She shook her head. Probably nothing to be done about it, except try and manage it. Because traditionally Blake was a master at not over-thinking things. Allowing herself a sigh, she conceded that there actually was something she should actively think about. She owed herself a check-in now that the sun was up and she had a moment alone.

How did she feel about Yang? No, too big, she had to start smaller. How did she feel about yesterday? Overwhelmed, mostly. But not bad. There were certainly painful aspects, but considering how things had ended up, they didn’t have the sting they’d had in the moment. Okay. That meant she felt good, or at least vaguely positive, about where she was at. Emotions had been running so high, she’d been worried that she’d wake up and realize that her… _arrangement_ with Yang had been a mistake. But no, it felt…calm? Except very much the opposite of calm, it was terrifying and exhilarating, her mind was absolutely racing, but still…there was something almost relaxing about having accepted what was happening, even if the actual “doing” part made her more than a little nervous. Like she was going with the flow, and even if the current was strong, she could let it carry her. Yet something niggled at the back of her mind as she finished making the almost alarmingly accurate mental comparison between existing in proximity to Yang Xiao Long and being swept away by a coursing river.

_Is this what living in the moment feels like?_

Blake had spent her childhood imagining the future, for herself and the faunus. After she’d left the White Fang, she’d never been able to let go of the past. Now, she didn’t know what would happen, and she knew what had happened already could still make things difficult. But as far as Yang was concerned, they were moving forward together and figuring it out as they went. The past acknowledged and set aside, the future created minute by minute. This was existing, mentally and emotionally, in the present. Which she guessed was just what most people called living.

Maybe she didn’t need this time to think, after all. How did she feel about Yang? A useless question. She had insufficient data for a meaningful answer. That was the point of spending time together. The more of that they did, the more she’d learn. Speaking of…

 _No time like the present!_ She chuckled to herself as she slipped out of bed, wincing inwardly at her own terrible joke. That was almost down to Yang’s level, which was bad, and she’d legitimately found it amusing, which was worse. She reached a hand down to gently shake her sleeping partner’s shoulder. The other girl stirred, some muffled noises coming from the pillow. Yang slowly, with seeming agony, rolled onto her side, yawning like a lion and shaking her mane from her face. A drowsy smile and half-lidded eyes shined up at Blake.

“G’morning. S’up?”

And Blake froze.

She’d seen Yang’s face upon waking up more times than she could count. She’d had to wake her at least once a week at Beacon, and there was nothing new about the greeting. For someone who valued her sleep so much, Yang never seemed to mind being woken up. But there was something different about her this morning. Something new in her eyes, or a wider than normal smile, or…no. No, there wasn’t. _It’s the exact same “good morning” as it always was. I just know what she’s feeling when she looks at me now._ Perhaps it shouldn’t have mattered, but the combination of the familiar and the recently discovered threw her. _Why didn’t I think of what I was going to say? Okay, um…_

“Hey, you…want some breakfast? I don’t think we ever really ate last night…” Yang’s face lit up, a spark of energy filling her eyes.

“Sounds great! Gimme a sec.” The blonde disentangled herself from her makeshift bed, standing and stretching, tank top riding up to bare her midriff over her shorts. Blake felt silly, still fully dressed from the night before, but Yang didn’t seem to notice. She gathered her hair into a ponytail, and then suddenly frowned. “You have a hair tie? I didn’t think to bring one when I grabbed these blankets.” Blake nodded, quickly grabbing a black one from her dresser. Yang flashed her a grin as she put her hair up.

“Thanks. Wait, why _do_ you have one? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear your hair up.” Blake had never really thought about that. She’d just taken it for granted that she should have one on hand.

“I might want to, someday, I guess?”

Yang’s smile grew. “I’d like to see that. You should get Weiss to braid it – Ruby’s really bad at braiding, I always sort of freaked out when she tried to touch my hair as a kid.” _I don’t blame her for wanting to, it’s impressive._ Without thinking, Blake found herself reaching a hand behind Yang’s neck, eyes curious. Her partner’s breath hitched, but Blake was already running her fingers delicately through the ponytail.

“It’s so soft,” she murmured. Yang was blushing.

“Thanks. I try and take care of it, but truth is I just kind of got lucky with the gene pool…” She trailed off, and it was another moment before Blake took her hand back, feeling guilty.

“I’m sorry, you literally just said you didn’t like your hair touched.”

“No, it’s fine! I don’t mind anymore, at least not with people I know well enough.” She smiled, but still seemed a little flustered. Blake made a mental note to be careful around Yang’s hair.

“I’ll give you some warning next time?” Yang nodded, and Blake gestured to the door. “Come on, I’m starting to realize how hungry I am.”

\--------------------------

As Blake left the room, Yang had to take a second to compose herself. Her heart was still pounding.

 _Dust, I thought she was going to kiss me!_ It was ridiculous, looking back, but in the moment…she shook her head, admonishing herself.

 _Get it together, Yang. She said a_ little _physical contact, you’ve barely even held hands!_ All the same…but no, that particular line of thinking was best reserved for when she was alone and not risking looking like an idiot in front of the girl she loved.

Loved. The thought came so easy to her. Maybe, if things were different, she’d just call it a long-standing crush, but…well, it wasn’t. It couldn’t be, after everything they’d been through. All of them had put their lives on the line more than once. That had a way of growing you up. She knew that in so many ways, they were just kids, but this wasn’t one of them. Not when “spending your life with someone” might just mean hanging out for a week. Ugh, morbidity looked bad on her this early in the morning. But speaking of good-looking things, she’d already let Blake get too far ahead. She hurried after her, practically bumping into Blake as the faunus stopped suddenly in the kitchen door. Looking over her shoulder, Yang could see why.

There were two plates laid out on the table, stacked with pancakes. The chef smiled at them over his cup of tea.

“Good morning. You have good timing, they should still be warm. I’m trying to make the batches so they finish around when people usually wake up. It’s almost a quarter after seven – I’m glad you slept in, Blake.”

“Ren, thank you, that’s so kind. Really. I hope it wasn’t too much trouble?” Ren just waved her off.

“None at all, besides trying to stop the smell from summoning Nora. They say your brain doesn’t process smell while you sleep, but then, none of the rules seem to apply to her when it comes to breakfast. Although, would you mind eating in your room? I have to get the next batch started for when Weiss gets up.”

Blake chuckled. “No, they really don’t. It’s no problem – thank you again.” She took the plates, delicately balancing them on each hand. “Yang, grab some forks and syrup?” Yang just nodded. She turned to Ren as Blake walked away, mouthing a silent but desperately earnest “thank you.” Her friend just nodded, smiling, noticeably refraining from anything resembling more cooking for the moment. Yang grabbed the necessities and headed for Blake’s room, glad that her partner hadn’t thought to question how Ren had known to make enough for two.

Fifteen minutes later, two syrup-soaked plates lay stacked on the nightstand, and the two of them laid stretched out on the bed, stomachs satisfied. Yang stifled a yawn, her hunger no longer helping to keep her up.

“I don’t know how you get up this early every day. Aren’t you tired by like, noon?”

“Not really. I’ve been waking up at the same time for years, I just sort of adjusted. It wasn’t easy at first, though. It took my body probably six months to recalibrate.” There was a brief pause. “Yang? Why did you sleep on the floor last night?”

Yang’s awareness of her body’s position relative to Blake suddenly skyrocketed. Heads next to each other on the pillow, hips brushing, legs splayed out next to Blake’s, which were crossed at the ankles. Nothing intimate, not really, but given the question? Electrifying.

“Should I not have?”

Blake frowned. “I don’t know. That depends on your answer.” Well, shit.

“I guess…I dunno, I woke up, had to pee, so I got up, and I was, well, worried. We didn’t mean to fall asleep together, and I didn’t want you to wake up and feel weird. I mean, I didn’t feel weird! Well, not bad-weird. Just…it might’ve felt that way for you. Seemed like the sort of thing you should have a say in, not just waking up next to a girl who you just started, uh, doing whatever it is we’re doing with, but it’s not like I wanted to move, wait, unless that’s weirder, because I really don’t want to pressure you, aaaaand I just realized you were asking why I didn’t go back to my own bed, not why I got out of yours.” Yang buried her burning face in her hands. “Okay, so if Salem _is_ going to destroy Remnant, could she maybe do it right about now?” She risked a peek at her partner, who was looking at her with what might’ve been bemusement, if it hadn’t been shrouded by nervousness.

The dark-haired girl cleared her throat, her voice wavering just a little. “I…actually wasn’t. It’s…sweet of you to think of how I’d feel about it. Thank you.”

Yang mutely nodded, unsure of her next words. Blake spared her, by sitting up, sighing, and pinching the bridge of her nose. “Shit, Yang, I’m sorry, I made things so _complicated_. If I could just get myself together, figure out how I’m feeling, we wouldn’t have to do this whole…whole not-dating-but-something thing that we’re doing.” She shook her head, practically whispering. “You’re so sure of this. Of how you feel. Even when I’m making it so hard, you’re always trying to make sure I’m all right with things. But this must be awful for you, Yang. You don’t deserve this.”

Yang was up faster than Blake could blink. No way was she going to let Blake feel guilty about this. _Not when I’m the one who made things difficult._ “Whoa, hey, Blake…” she reached out, tentatively resting her hand on her partner’s shoulder, hoping she wasn’t overstepping her bounds in such an emotionally-charged moment. “You can’t be this hard on yourself. You’re getting in your own head. I want this, whatever it is, for as long as you want it. I’ve lived with how I feel about you for a long time. Getting any chance to really show you…that could never be a bad thing.” Blake turned to look at her, face filled with emotions that Yang couldn’t identify. But suddenly she was rocking back as Blake hugged her, tight, pulling Yang into her arms, burying the blonde’s head in her neck. Yang was startled, to say the least, but she overrode her immediate instinct to start rubbing Blake’s back in favor of just returning the embrace. _Okay, I think I just hold her until she says something and we see how this plays out?_

Yang rarely got anxious. Yang never liked waiting. As wonderful as it was to be in Blake’s arms, the two were suddenly overlapping, and it manifested. First, she became way too aware of her hands. _Are they at the right height? Wait, is there too much contact? Are my palms supposed to be on her back, or just my fingertips, or WHAT THE HELL WHY CAN’T I REMEMBER HOW TO HUG?_ The internal scream caused another unfortunate attunement: because, really, what even _was_ breathing? She could feel Blake’s breathing, and suddenly that raised all sorts of questions about the appropriate speed of her own respiration. _Do I match her breath? Alternate? Am I going too fast? Yang, come on, you’ve been breathing your whole life! Which will end if you_ stop _breathing! Dust, I am completely fucked. Imagine if we kissed, would I just stop functioning?_

_…imagine if we kissed._

_FUCK_.

And then, at long last, blessed relief. Blake pulled away, seemingly unaware of Yang’s near-death experience. Blake seemed calmer, more composed.

“Thank you. I’m trying not to overthink things, but it’s…sort of a constant struggle. I swear, I had it figured out, like, half an hour ago.” She gave Yang a weak smile, and that jump-started Yang’s brain. She smiled back.

“Yeah, you’re not the only one having that problem. We’re a bit of a mess, huh?” Blake chuckled in response. “Tell you what: why don’t we just talk?”

Blake arched an eyebrow. “Not that I object, but did you have something in mind?”

“I did, actually! Us. Not, you know, _us_ -us, just about ourselves.”

“Don’t we already know most things about each other?”

Yang waved her concern away. “Yeah, all the serious stuff. But not the fun stuff! Okay, I ask a question, you answer, then it’s your turn. You can choose not to answer any question, no judgement…unless you’re avoiding it because it’s embarrassing, in which case you have to tell me.” Yang grinned wolfishly. Blake rolled her eyes, but the small, almost mischievous grin on her face belied their intent.

“Yeah…okay. But same goes for you!”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I don't like when fanfic authors do the whole, "I'm sorry it's been so long since I posted!" thing.
> 
> So I won't!
> 
> That being said, I do now kind of understand that, even if you don't consider what you're doing a Big Deal, the fact that it might matter to people other than you does make you want to continue to provide something they enjoy and ensure they know you're grateful for their interest in your work.


	7. Chapter 7

Yang yawned, not bothering to try and hide it. She’d insisted that she and Blake sit upright, or she was sure she’d fall asleep again, but even with their backs against the wall, the bed beneath them was too comfortable for her own good. The temptation to just slide onto the soft covers was immense, which was why Blake was between her and the pillow. The dark-haired girl raised an eyebrow.

“You sure you don’t need to nap?”

“Firstly, it’s not even nine yet, naps are just called ‘going back to bed,’ and secondly, don’t enable me,” Yang groaned. Blake just smiled. “Come one, my turn first. I’ll give you an easy one – favorite book?”

“What? Yang, how could you possibly think that’s easy to answer?”

“Huh? I just assumed it would be _Ninjas of Love_!” Yang’s genuine puzzlement seemed to ease Blake’s irritation.

“I swear, do people think that’s the only book I read? Yeah, I like _Ninjas of Love_ , but there’s more than just romance out there. There’s history, fantasy, classic literature, all sorts of things. _Ninjas of Love_ is just one option.” But Blake’s adamant rebuttal was a little undercut by her shifting eyes. Yang wanted to remind her of the rules of their game, but felt like waiting might be the best choice. Sure enough, Blake soon looked away, muttering. “Besides, _Ninjas_ is a series and I can’t decide which one is best.” Yang chuckled, shaking her head.

“I’m still counting that as me being right! I didn’t know you liked fantasy. Those were my favorite books when I was a kid.”

“I never imagined tiny Yang being much of a reader.”

“I wasn’t, really. I always preferred doing. But I loved hearing about heroes on adventures, fighting monsters…they didn’t inspire me the way they did with Ruby, but Summer read to me, too.” Yang’s smile softened, still present, but tinged with nostalgia. “I always wanted to be the knight, going on long journeys, facing down evil…” She almost stopped there, but… _screw it._ “Getting the girl.”

Her concerns melted away as Blake laughed. “That’s funny – I always wanted to be the princess the knight rescued.”

Yang shot forward, staring at Blake. “What!?! You? I figured you’d have wanted to be some…some kind of…I don’t know, dark-magic-shadow-assassin!”

“Why would I? I grew up fighting for faunus rights. I learned early that I’d have to fight that battle myself. I kind of ended up as one of those in real life. It’s not like I’d ever want to be the sort of person who relied on someone else to do things for them,” _Or even help them, in fact_. “but when I read fantasy, it felt nice to pretend to be the person someone else was fighting for.” Suddenly, Blake stopped, the end of her sentence halting as though she’d been about to continue. She seemed tense. Strained. Yang glanced down, and saw Blake’s fists clenched in her lap. The other girl slowly let out a breath, and her hands relaxed, but she didn’t say anything more.

“Blake? What is it?”

The faunus just shook her head, whispering. “I got to have that in real life, too, didn’t I? And then I left the knight who saved me behind.” Her damp eyes opened, lingering on Yang’s right arm.

_Oh._

_…no._

“You know what? Nope.” Blake looked up, confused. “We are not doing this today. Blake, I know this isn’t something we get over right away, either of us, but we’re never going to get anywhere,” _As a couple?_ She swallowed. “We’re not going to get anywhere with this if you feel like you owe me anything, or if I’m mad all the time, or more importantly, if we can never stop thinking about it long enough to relax. Today’s about fun. You remember fun?”

Blake chuckled, despite herself. “Vaguely.”

Yang grinned. “Good. Because it’s your turn.”

\-------------------------- 

Hugging Yang wasn’t just to stall for time. Blake knew her partner was right, and it wouldn’t do either of them any good to stay trapped in their own heads constantly. She really did appreciate being reminded of that. Not everything could be doom and gloom all the time.

…of course, she also didn’t have a question in mind, but that was mere coincidence.

Unsurprisingly, Blake’s ability to squeeze gave out well before Yang’s, so she had to rush her thinking process a little.

“Weapons!”

A brief pause. “Was there a question in there?”

Blake shook her head. “Sorry, I mean…how did you get the idea for Ember Celica? Ruby’s so into every kind of weapon, and you just went with…I mean, not _just_ …oh, shit.” But Yang perked up even further, clearly happy to explain.

“No, it’s okay! I never get to talk about this! Yeah, Ruby’s nuts about them, so she sort of owns any of those conversations. She always says that old line, that they’re an extension of ourselves? I guess I never felt the need to extend myself all that much.” That tracked. Yang Xiao Long, pure and uncut. “I thought about maybe doing some kind of sword, like a huge one? Dad said if I were going to do that I should just use an axe, because the force would all be concentrated, but I wanted more of it to have sharp edges. But when I tried using it, it just kept me too far away from the action. I barely ever used my semblance. Honestly, I think I kind of felt pressured – Ruby was younger than me, but she figured out her weapon way earlier. It would be a while before she made Crescent Rose, but the idea was always there, even when she was just using a practice scythe. Eventually, I just kind of stopped over-thinking it, you know? I just wanted to smash things and make them explode, so I found the simplest way to do both of them at once.” Yang was beaming. Her sister may have been the one known for her love of weaponry, but Yang’s enthusiasm for combat was unmatched. She could practically see the blonde replaying battles in her head. “What about you?”

 _Well, they say honesty is the best policy._ “Grappling hook.”

“Huh?”

Blake shrugged. “I just really wanted a grappling hook. I loved the acrobatics, especially once my semblance manifested. A grappling hook would help me run, jump, climb, get everywhere, see everything. That just happened to make the most sense with a knife. Over the years I kind of extended it to what it is now, added a pistol, and strengthened it. Made sure it could do everything, in case I needed it to. And that does not count as your question.”

“Ha! Fair enough. I do wonder what Weiss would say if the ‘only other one on the team who cared at all about elegance and grace in combat’ admitted that she just wanted to jump higher…”

Blake’s eyes narrowed. “You wouldn’t.”

“Oh, I would.”

“Okay. Fine. But you can’t go more than three days without breaking out that uncannily good Weiss impression. And I swear I will be recording the next time you do. I think she’ll forget all about me.” Blake’s serious demeanor broke towards the end, and Yang didn’t bother hiding her mirth.

“Mutually assured destruction! Well played, Belladonna.”

“Don’t mess with me, Xiao Long.” They were both smiling, but then Yang’s grin took on a conniving air.

“All right, done messing around. Tell me about your first kiss?”

Blake hadn’t thought it was possible to do a spit take without a drink, but she found herself quickly corrected. “Yang, hold on, I don’t think – ”

“Ah, ah, ah! Remember the rules? It’s your first kiss, and if it’s embarrassing…”

“I know, it’s not that, it’s…” _We weren’t going to do this today…dammit._ “Yang, it was…it was with Adam.”

She waited. But nothing happened. After a few seconds of unbearable tension, she peeked at her partner. Yang looked thoroughly nonplussed.

“Yeah, duh. What was it _like_?”

“I…wait, I don’t understand. You aren’t mad?”

Yang rolled her eyes. “Blake. I _hate_ Adam. That’s not exactly a huge surprise. But I already knew that you two had that kind of history. I made my peace with that a long time ago. I kind of had to.” She blew out a long breath. “And that wasn’t easy, or fun, but if you think the fact that your ex tried to kill us both is going to get you out of talking about your relationship history, then you underestimate how huge of a get-out-of-jail-free card that would be…and how important you are to me.”

Blake just sat there. She had no idea how to respond. She knew she mattered to Yang, more than most people, even, but to hear her say it brought all kinds emotions, ones she…ones she’d agreed not to deal with today. For Yang.

“Bad. He was enthusiastic, I was shy, neither of us had any idea what we were doing. It was just in a back alley, sometime in the afternoon, when we had a moment alone. But it could’ve been on the beach in Mistral during a full moon and I honestly don’t think it would’ve helped.”

Yang absolutely snorted. “Well, I’d be lying if I said that didn’t make me feel a little better. My first kiss, on the other hand, was perfect.”

Blake knew she was being baited. But her curiosity got the better of her. “Do tell?”

The blonde shook her hair behind her head, the golden locks flirtatiously exposing her collarbone. “School dance when I was fourteen. Slow dancing with Veridian Bercilak, the prettiest girl in my grade. Kissed under the disco ball right as the song hit the chorus. Magical.”

Blake was equal parts intrigued and…irritated? She wanted to know more, but she felt like she already knew too much. Wait.

 _Blake Belladonna, are you_ jealous _of a fourteen-year-old girl from Yang’s middle school?_

That raised some internal questions about what she wanted from this not-relationship, but she had external questions that needed asking. It was her turn. “That does sound better. A lot better. Have you…always known you were interested in girls?”

Yang didn’t skip a beat. “Yup. Don’t get me wrong, I like guys, too. I just never really bothered to differentiate. If someone’s good-looking, who cares what gender they are? I haven’t gotten crushes on guys as much as girls, I guess, but it’s happened once or twice.”

“I admire that.” _I feel like I admire everything I learn about you_. “So, your turn?”

“If you could own any Grimm as a pet, what would it be?” _Wait, that’s it_? She felt like she was being messed with, but she couldn’t quite figure out how. Things had been getting…serious? Interesting? _Let’s go with “specific.”_ And then Yang pulled this one out of nowhere, so innocuously. She let the question sit for a minute before answering, but couldn’t quite get over the change in tone.

“A nevermore. One big enough to fly on.”

“Nice! I'd say an ursa, but I feel like between me and it, that would be asking for a huge repair bill. Maybe a couple little beowolf puppies, so they could keep each other company while I was gone!”

Dust, that irked her. They’d been going somewhere kind of deep, and now they were talking about the cutest possible iteration of their soulless enemies? Why did she have to get emotional whiplash like that?

_Or, why just me?_

And without thinking, Blake asked, “Yang, have you ever had sex?”

You could’ve heard a pin drop.

And then Yang laughed.

“Finally, she’s coming out to play! About time you asked a big one.” Blake couldn’t quite find it in herself to be annoyed at how easily she’d been manipulated, but she swore then and there that she’d find some way to throw Yang off her game. Her partner did actually look a bit nervous. “I, uh, don’t know if there’s an answer you want, but…no, I haven’t. I’ve been on dates, but never really anything more than that. I mean, second base a few times, but I was never really into any of them enough to want to seal the deal, you know? Nothing against it, just didn’t feel the need. Hope that’s okay? I feel like we’re at this weird age where I can’t tell if anyone’s “supposed” to have done it or not, same with kissing, even. Like, is there an expected answer here?”

Blake’s eyes were soft. She felt her previous desire to get even abating slightly at the sudden show of vulnerability, “Not from me, Yang. I promise.” The smile Yang flashed her was relieved and earnest.

“Thanks. Really. So…whaaaaat about you?”

Well, of course that had been coming. Only way out was through. She knew it was supposed to be okay, but even so…still, she had to answer. She forced herself not to look away. “…yes. Adam and I slept together.” She was ashamed. And she hated it. Not of having sex, although she was worried about what Yang would think. No, she was ashamed that she’d shared that with someone who became such a damned monster. Someone who’d hurt, really hurt, the person she was opening up to now.

“Blake.”

She realized that she’d been hugging herself, tight enough to leave nail marks on her arms.

“Oh. Sorry.”

Yang just reached out and squeezed her shoulder.

“Blake, I said it was okay, and I meant it. I sort of figured you had. Just because he’s an asshole now doesn’t mean that you could’ve known that would happen. I think that probably happens with a lot of people, your ex just happens to also be a gaslighting sociopath who’s stronger than he should be. So…okay, maybe ‘asshole’ doesn’t really cover it, but you get the point. You won’t get any judgement.”

“Yang…I was fifteen.”

“Okay. Are you worried that I think fifteen is too young to have sex? Or saying that your choice of partner was lousy because you were fifteen and fifteen-year-olds are idiots? Because I’m sure as hell not qualified to tell anyone when they should be having sex, and I sure as hell _was_ an idiot when I was fifteen. Veridian Bercilak was dumb as a rock.”

And Blake laughed. Genuinely laughed. She felt as though her shoulders were ten pounds lighter. This was something that she’d known they’d have to confront. But the pain she’d expected…it just wasn’t there. Hers or Yang’s.

_We’re not doing pain, remember? Not today._

Blake didn’t know if she could speak. So she leaned in for a hug, and pressed her lips firmly against Yang’s cheek. It was a long moment before she pulled away.

“Yang…thank you.”

Yang’s eyes were sparkling. “’Course, don’t be ridiculous. Hey, my turn, right?”

“Yeah,” Blake smiled.

“Cool! Blake, will you go out with me?”

“Okay, you lost me. Aren’t we already doing…that…kind of?”

“No, I mean, literally, like on an actual date!”

“Oh. Oh!” Blake blushed, a deep crimson tinting her cheeks. “I mean, yes, of course, but…”

Yang frowned. “What is it? We don’t have to, if it’s not okay.”

“No, no, it is, just…I’ve never been on a real date before.”

Yang’s eyes went wide. “What! No! Even with – ”

“This may shock you,” Blake said, voicing absolutely dripping with sarcasm, “but Adam was never really the dinner-and-a-movie type.”

“Yeah, that actually does make sense. I guess I just assumed…wait, holy shit, I’ll be your first date!” It was impossible not to smile looking at that beaming face.

“Yes, Yang. You’ll be my first date.” She fidgeted. “Um…I probably shouldn’t ask you, but do you have any tips?” Yang giggled in a very un-Yang-like manner.

“Oh, Blake. Just the two. Firstly: dates are the worst. They’re like hanging out but with extra pressure!” Yang’s obvious glee at her discomfort contrasted sharply with the grim truth behind her words.

“Wonderful. So…is this…do we dress up?”

“Um, duh! Casual dates are waaay better, but if this is your first date, we’re doing all the clichés! Getting dressed up, going to a nice restaurant, finding a nice park to walk in afterwards, the whole deal!”

Blake sighed. “I suppose this is my penance for defying society’s expectations. Although, speaking of…Yang, should we talk about that?”

“About what?”

Blake waggled her ears. “You and me. Considering this.”

This time, Yang’s smile was reassuring, rather than the cold delight at Blake’s expense. “Not today. And spoiler alert, I think it’ll be a short conversation anyway.”

Blake wanted to push the issue. Blake wanted to tell her that she didn’t, couldn’t, know what it was like to face that kind of oppression, just the little things, every day. The way they added up. But the truth was? She believed Yang. No matter what she said, she knew what Yang would say: “Fuck that.” And she’d say it with that look in her eye that said that nobody, _nobody_ , was going to tell her right from wrong, and dust help anyone who tried to stop her.

Blake loved that look.

“You’re…really special, Yang. You know that, right?”

Yang flushed, and started to stammer, but nothing Blake could make out. Her partner took a moment to compose herself, and let out a breath before speaking softly. “Dad and Rubes say that all the time. But damn, does it sound different coming from you.”

Blake tugged nervously at her shirt. “Good different?”

Yang’s lavender eyes were so deep, Blake thought she’d drown. “Amazing different.”

The moment was silent, but neither of them needed to speak to understand. However, the moment was also a short one. Blake laughed as Yang’s mouth opened and let out what was basically a roar.

“Yang, you yawned so wide I could see down your throat. You don’t need to learn to be an early riser in one day. You should rest.”

The blonde shook her head adamantly. “Not gonna happen. I want to keep hanging out with you. If that’s okay?”

Blake shook her head; this wasn’t her way of getting rid of Yang, she just wanted the poor girl to get some sleep.

“Who said anything about not hanging out?” And Blake took Yang’s shoulders, and gently lowered her partner until her head was in Blake’s lap. Yang positively groaned.

“Coooomfy…dust, are you sure, Blake? I might be out for a while.” Blake leaned over to get her book from the nightstand and reached it with a minimum amount of budging required from Yang.

“I’ll be fine, Yang. Thanks for this…all of it.”

Yang’s arms wrapped around her legs, squeezing them tightly. “I think I got the good end of the deal – same conversation as you plus the world’s best pillow.”

Blake couldn’t help herself – she had been seeing Yang’s outfits for a while now. “I feel like you’d make a better one.”

She could swear she could see Yang blushing beneath her hair. _Revenge is mine, Xiao Long_. But just as she savored that thought, another crept into her head.

“Wait, Yang? What was your second piece of advice about dating?”

Yang’s chuckle was more of a cackle. “Right, I almost forgot to tell you! Second thing is to be prepared for a lot of fussing. Because Ruby’s going to want to help me get ready, and that means you, dear Blake, will be spending the day preparing with Weiss.”

Blake’s groan was long, and loud.

“We meet at the front of the house tomorrow at six in the evening, don’t be late!”

“How could I be?” But Yang had fallen asleep as soon as the sentence had left her mouth. Blake smiled down at her before starting to read, one hand absently stroking the blonde’s hair. Things had been an absolutely whirlwind since she’d come to talk to Yang in the garage. But right now, she was…happy. Just happy, without anything else weighing her down. They didn’t just get to skip over the difficult parts. There would be things to talk about. Trust to mend. All sorts of hurts that needed tending to. Blake just smiled at the thought.

_But not today._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoosh, this one was a long time coming. Between being a tough chapter to write, and my computer temporarily banishing what I had to the twisting nether, it took way more time than I expected. But I'm happy with the result, so I'll say it's worth it and call it a day. I inevitably end up getting one big push of inspiration and knocking out a chapter in basically one sitting anyway, so I probably shouldn't have overthought it in the first place.
> 
> I felt like it was important to explore relationship history. Adam figures so strongly in Blake's past that he kind of overshadows everything else, and Yang is left as a completely blank slate in the show. I wanted to try and change up what I felt the "expected" dynamic was between them, especially since they're eighteen, which, as they mention, is a weird age to deal with relationships at.
> 
> ...said the wizened 23-year-old dude.


	8. Chapter 8

“Honestly, you don’t own _anything_ that isn’t skin-tight?” The former heiress’ voice was chilly with disapproval. “I’m good at this, but I’m not Coco. I can’t take an empty closet and turn it into a gala-ready ballgown.”

Blake’s inner self dueled between annoyance and insecurity. Why _would_ she have anything that wasn’t specifically for combat purposes? It wasn’t as though she’d anticipated a night on the town when she’d left Menagerie. But that voice was drowned out by the much louder one, sounding unsurprisingly similar to Weiss’ own, that was increasingly worried that this whole thing was going to be a disaster. She was so deeply out of her element. But Weiss seemed to move on, sparing no more thought for her frustration, focusing entirely on what useful data had come from her assessment of the situation.

“You need something floor-length, because we don’t have time to find you real heels. Your boots will be fine as long as most of them are covered. Sleeveless, you’d be amazed at how much warmer even thin sleeves can make it, and unlike me, you aren’t naturally cold all the time.” Her eyes flashed, as if daring the faunus to make an “ice queen” joke, but Blake simply nodded meekly in the face of her friend’s purposeful monologue. “You could pull off something strapless, but I think a keyhole over your sternum could be appropriate yet tantalizing, so that means straps and a scooping neckline. Back or no back?”

It took Blake several seconds to register that she’d been asked a question. “Huh, oh, um…back, I guess?” Weiss rolled her eyes.

“You know, if you paid attention, you might learn something here!”

Blake shook her head. “Even if I had a notebook, I couldn’t write nearly fast enough to keep up.” Her teammate grunted in what was probably amusement, not that she’d admit it.

“All right, we have a basic design. Let’s see if any of the shops in town have something close enough that could just use a little tailoring.”

“Tailoring? Are you sure this isn’t going a bit overboard, Weiss?”

Weiss’ eyes narrowed. “You tell me. I love you, Blake, but I know how new this is for you, and if you’re getting cold feet or think this was a bad idea, this is your best chance to say something. She’ll be hurt, but she’ll recover. What do _you_ want?”

Wasn’t that just the million-lien question? She’d been asking herself that a lot lately. What she and Yang were doing…it was dangerous. They both knew it. But Yang was clear on her position. Whether or not this went anywhere…that was really up to Blake. It was too soon to have any real answers, but she knew some things. She knew that being close to Yang had felt good. She knew it’d been easier to get used to more physical contact than she’d thought it would. She knew that, yesterday, just spending time with Yang once the blonde had woken up again made the day feel full, even though they hadn’t really done anything.

And she knew that she was really, really nervous about tonight.

“So,” she said meekly, “you mentioned a tailor?”

\--------------------------

“Are you gonna wear it?” The question wasn’t unexpected; Ruby hadn’t taken her eyes off Yang’s robotic arm all morning. The blonde sighed a bit.

“Yeah, Rubes. I’m trying to wear it as much as possible. I guess I’m worried that if I keep taking it off all the time, I’ll never really accept that it’s a part of me now. That I’ll never make my peace with it. Besides, it’s not like it’s uncomfortable, just different. And it’s really convenient to have two hands available.”

Her sister nodded. “That makes sense. You can, like, pull out her chair for her and stuff! Ooh, where are you taking her?”

“There’s a surf and turf place that looks good, and given everything that’s going on around here…well, let’s just say it wasn’t hard to get a reservation.” She held up two simple dresses she’d found last night, one golden, one black. “What do you think? I used to wear white, but it doesn’t match the arm. So, until we can talk about the birds and the bees, can you set aside that ‘sexless amorphous blob’ thing from the other day and help me decide which is better?”

Ruby took a moment to look them up and down. She seemed to hesitate at first, but Yang’s stare was inquiring, and she couldn’t evade it forever. She answered slowly, quietly, voice barely above a whisper.

“Well, I guess it kind of depends? Do you want her to stay up all night thinking about you or stay up all night underneath you?”

There was a long, palpably tense pause. Ruby looked like death couldn’t come soon enough, and Yang…Yang was just shocked. For the first time, she’d gotten a glimpse of the Ruby that Weiss saw when they were alone. She’d always sort of figured that Weiss was constantly in charge and her little sister was just stumbling through it.

She was so damn proud.

Yang’s grin was wicked as sin. “I knew those Xiao Long genes were in you somewhere. Black, then. Definitely black.”

\--------------------------

“Anything but black.” Blake couldn’t believe either of her sets of ears. She turned to Weiss in shock, but her friend’s demeanor was as icy as her eyes as she pointedly ignored Blake in favor of speaking with the tailor. Herself a feline faunus, some sort of puma as evidenced by her tail, the woman across the counter from them gave Blake an appraising eye.

“Hm…we could do a forest green, or maybe purple?”

Weiss shook her head after a moment’s thought. “Green would look nice, but not classical enough for a first date. She wears purple almost as much as black, it won’t be eye-catching enough to someone who’s seen it on her so often.”

“Ah, a friend turned lover?” The tailor smiled devilishly at Blake, who was desperately wishing she was either somewhere else or at least being addressed herself. But it was clear to everyone in the room that Weiss was calling the shots, so maybe the woman just didn’t want to waste her time. “Perhaps a blue? Close enough for comfort but still a welcome departure for someone not expecting it. Royal?”

“Make it navy and you’ve got a deal.” Weiss was grinning, though at the woman’s skill or her teammate’s discomfort was anyone’s guess.

“Done! Can I recommend an illusion neckline? It’ll keep the keyhole and back you wanted, but the see-through fabric will be a bit more suggestive.” Was that want Blake wanted? To be suggestive? What exactly was she suggesting? Maybe instead, just…flirty? Was that the right term? Or, wait, were flirty and suggestive the same thing? Once again, she bemoaned just how out of her depth she was as her dear friend readily agreed. But the negotiations weren’t quite finished.

“Oh, before I take this job, one condition.”

Now Weiss was alert, her old heiress persona returning at the drop of a hat to prevent anyone from taking advantage of her. “Excuse me? I wasn’t aware that it was common practice for a tailor to dictate terms to a client.”

The faunus was unimpressed. “Well, this time, there’s no choice.” She looked Blake up and down again, and Blake could have sworn her clothes were invisible to this woman. “We’re doing it high-waisted, a sash under and partially covering the bust should do it. Any court would convict me of criminal negligence if I wasted those legs with an A-line.”

Weiss smirked wider than ever. Blake was certain she’d never stop blushing.

\--------------------------

The top of the dress was basically a back-baring halter top made of black silk with a plunging neckline, but the fabric beneath her breasts tied off onto the second part, what was essentially a skirt of the same material. The knot sat in the center of her torso, a small slit left open over her belly button. She just wore sandals with it, nothing too fancy. Despite her younger sister’s extremely confidence-boosting comments, she knew nothing would go nearly that far tonight…but she had to admit, she looked damn good in this.

That was a nice feeling. Appreciating her own body. Since she’d lost her arm, that had been a difficult task. No matter what, she felt as though there was a glaring imperfection that would never be concealed. But it wasn’t hidden at all right now, the metallic black and yellow perfectly clear in a dress that bared her arms completely, and she still felt all right. Not safe, not exactly, and certainly still a little vulnerable. But she had other things to be nervous about, and truthfully, she knew Blake did, too, and that helped. If her partner was so fixated on the date, then the odds were good she wouldn’t be feeling guilty about the arm.

“Man, imagine if all this had happened at Beacon, huh?”

Yang tilted her head. “What do you mean?”

Ruby shrugged. “Well, I mean…this is all kind of normal teenager stuff. It’s weird to think about doing that in a normal teenager kinda way, you know? We’d um…we’d have to find some way to divide up the room.”

The blonde laughed. “Yeah, we’d need a sock-on-the-door system or something.” She frowned. “Not that – I mean, Blake and I aren’t…you know, maybe someday, but this is still just testing and seeing how she feels and stuff, nothing like…that. Yet. Or maybe ever.”

Ruby giggled. “But hopefully ‘yet,’ right?”

Yang hesitated…then grinned, abashed. “Hopefully.”

\--------------------------

Waiting for surveillance, that was one thing. Blake had been on stakeouts, infiltrations, spent hours sitting motionlessly, knowing that at any moment she could be forced to spring into action. But somehow, on this cushy chair in a lobby, she couldn’t stop squirming. She was certain it wouldn’t be ready in time. She just knew it. Weiss had long since given up on trying to calm her down, instead messaging Ruby on her scroll to discuss their respective difficulties in date-assistance. But nothing seemed to help Blake relax, not even the gentle purring sounds on her own scroll that she’d die before telling anyone about. When the tailor finally emerged, Blake practically leapt from the chair.

“Sorry about the wait! As promised, one high-waisted navy blue with an illusion neckline, flowing all the way to the floor. There was, however, one alteration.” She turned, and unzipping the bag keeping it safe, revealed the dress. “It needed more color, and something that would make it pop. That’s what took so long. Hope it’s all right?”

Blake just stared. The translucent fabric of the straps had been beaded in intricate patterns, half in a blue matching the dress. But outlining them and providing the rest of the decoration was bright gold, with an elaborate golden brooch cinching the sash right between her breasts. Golden as the sun. And nobody who’d seen Team RWBY doubted where – who – their sunlight came from.

Blake breathed out in a mix of happiness and awe. “It’s perfect.”

\--------------------------

“Yang, how come you didn’t tell me?”

“Hm?”

“About how you felt about Blake. You told Weiss.”

Yang sighed, running a hand over her forehead and through her hair. “I’m sorry about that, Rubes, I guess…it was a few things. But, mostly, I just felt kind of pathetic. Not good enough.” She cast her eyes down. “Weak. I never wanted you to see me like that.”

“Yang…” Her sister came up behind her, putting a hand on her shoulder. “You’ve always taken care of me. Always. I can’t imagine anyone stronger than you. And that won’t change…not even if you let me take care of you sometimes.” Yang’s hand went to her shoulder, squeezing her sister’s.

“Not used to being the one who needs taking care of.”

“With Salem still out there, I feel like we’re all going to need some looking after from time to time.” Ruby leaned in, hugging Yang around the neck from behind. “You’re my sister, Yang. I love you. And thanks to you, I’m not just the younger sister who needs looking after. I can be here for you. I wanna be. So from now on, we tell each other everything, okay?”

Yang reached up, squeezing her sister’s arms. She held them there for a moment, then let out a breath. “Yeah. Yeah, I promise.”

“Me, too.” Ruby was smiling wide. Yang never got tired of that smile. Her mom may be a selfish bitch who put herself before everything else, including her daughter…but whatever had had to happen to put Ruby on Remnant was worth it. Yang stood and turned to give her sister a full, proper hug.

“Everything, huh?”

“Yup!”

“So…is the Ice Queen cold everywhere?” Yang instinctively ducked…but the pillow wasn’t forthcoming. Ruby’s face was as red as her name, but she had that look in her eye that said she clearly wasn’t backing down. She took a deep breath, and gave a little smirk as she met her sister’s violet eyes with her silver ones.

“No. No, she is not.”

\--------------------------

“So, what do you think?”

Blake had to admit, Weiss knew what she was doing. The reflection in the mirror was elegant, tasteful, even – dare she say it – _sexy_. She was grateful for the familiarity of her boots, because she couldn’t recognize the rest of herself. “Thank you, Weiss, really. This is amazing.”

“Oh, please, it was nothing.” That was a lie. Blake could tell the other girl was extremely pleased with herself. “One last thing. What do you want to do with your hair?”

Blake took a moment. She’d sort of figured she’d just wear it the way she usually did, maybe a bit more carefully brushed…but something Yang had said floated back to her.

“Weiss,” she said slowly, “do you know how to braid?”

A raised eyebrow was the only sign of her teammate’s surprise. “No, servants did that on the rare occasion I allowed them to.” She paused for a moment, and then let out a sigh. “But I think I know someone who might.”

\--------------------------

Jaune was a simple man with simple tastes. He’d finished training for the day, he’d had his bubble bath, and now he was eating a bowl of Pumpkin Pete’s while watching unlikely animal friendship videos on his scroll. 

“You. You have seven sisters, right?”

He sat bolt upright without realizing it. “Ah! Yes ma’am!” Well, that was an embarrassing instinct.

She gazed at him imperiously. “Do you know how to braid hair?”

Practically choking on his cereal, Jaune gave a quick nod.

“Good. Come.” And with that, he was being dragged to dust knows where, his cereal left to grow soggy and unappetizing. He sighed. It was going to be one of those nights.

\--------------------------

“You’re…actually really good at this. Thank you.” Jaune mumbled something, but with the pins in his mouth, it was basically unintelligible. As he finished pinning Blake’s hair in place, a tight bun at the base of her scalp, he gave it another shot.

“No problem! I used to do this all the time for my sisters. It’s nice to get a chance to do it again.” He smiled wistfully, moving on to tucking and brushing any loose hairs. “Soooo…you nervous for your daaate?”

Blake could feel Weiss getting ready to shut him down, so she gracefully came to his rescue. “I…am, actually.” She hadn’t really meant to keep talking, but she found herself speaking regardless. “I don’t really know how dates work. Yang’s my best friend, what if this is weird? I’ve never really done romance. I mean, not…the romantic kind.” She finished lamely. But her improvised hair stylist’s voice was warm.

“Well, I don’t know much about it. I’ve, uh, kinda always gotten that wrong.” In the mirror she could see him glance at Weiss, and it would’ve been hard for her response of “that’s for sure” be any louder even if she’d actually said it out loud. “But I know what it’s like to fall in love with your best friend, without even realizing it. It won’t be weird at all. Just the two of you, like normal, but…extra. I promise.”

The room was quiet. Blake didn’t know what to say. Weiss looked uncomfortable, almost ashamed. They were both tense. But not Jaune. Yes, his words were a little softer, his smile a little sadder. But he seemed calm. Just happy for her, for someone to experience what he had. Blake gulped down a lump in her throat. For the few minutes it took him to finish up, she didn’t speak.

“So, what do you think?”

She stood up, using the mirror to see her hair expertly gathered together, not a strand out of place. She turned, and without a thought, pulled Jaune into a tight hug.

“It’s beautiful. Thank you.” He was blushing when she pulled away. Weiss stepped up.

“It’s just about time, Blake. Are you ready?”

Blake took a deep breath. Her stomach was flipping. She smiled. “Yeah. I guess I am.”

\--------------------------

As the two of them watched the faunus exit to wait for her partner, Weiss turned to Jaune.

“You did very well. Thank you.”

He rubbed the back of his neck, smiling sheepishly. “Hey, I’m just glad I could help.”

She gritted her teeth. This was almost physically painful to say…but less than she’d thought it’d be.

“You know, we actually make a pretty good team.”

He seemed practically paralyzed, as though the slightest movement would cause her to verbally chastise him so severely that he’d be prescribed painkillers and bedrest. But she just gave him a small nod. “You’re…a good friend.” She whirled and walked inside quickly, eager to relax with Ruby after her day. She heard him, as she left, whispering giddily to himself:

“And so, the noble terrier and the cold-blooded snake became friends at last!”

She’d kill anyone who said she’d smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, this was a tough one! I learned more about dresses than I knew there ever was to learn! I've included links to the inspirations for Blake and Yang's dresses below.
> 
> https://www.lindadress.com/product/1717/navy-blue-empire-prom-dress-with-beaded-neckline
> 
> https://www.forever21.com/us/shop/catalog/product/f21/branded-shop/2000311838


	9. Chapter 9

“How do you think it’s going?”

“I don’t know, Ruby.”

“I wonder if they’re holding hands.”

“I don’t know, Ruby.”

“Oh man, what if they’ve _kissed_?”

“Ruby, I lack the power of foresight, and, as such, _I don’t know_.”

“…I bet Blake ordered tuna.”

“…yes, Ruby. She probably did.”

\--------------------------

Blake, who had lived her life as a chieftain’s daughter, a resistance member, and a monster hunter, had somehow managed throughout all her years to avoid eating a steak. They’d always seemed tough, chewy, and generally suffused with a distinct lack of flavor. And, according to Yang, she was right, by and large.

But this was an exception.

A creamy, buttery garlic shrimp sauce adorned the otherwise simple hunk of meat, and the extra moisture and rich flavors of the sea helped mitigate her concerns. In return, the steak added some substance to the light fare that was most shrimp dishes. She’d barely finished cleaning her plate before looking at her partner, the blonde smiling over her own steak au poivre.

“Yang, that was delicious. How did you know I’d like it?” Her partner shrugged, finishing her own meal, swallowing perhaps a little too quickly in her haste to answer.

“I mean, I wasn’t positive. But this place is like, known for their combination meals, and this was the most seafoody option.”

“Well, your gamble paid off. Consider me impressed.” Honestly, Blake hadn’t been sure what she’d been getting into. It was…different. She’d never tried steak, she certainly didn’t know how it mixed with her preferences, it could easily have gone badly. But she’d trusted Yang. Yang, who always seemed to know what felt right. _And I think I just made my dinner into an extremely convoluted metaphor about my relationship with Yang. Okay, let’s move on._ “What happens now? The walk in the park, right?”

“Sort of. Turns out there’s somewhere better.” Which, with Yang Xiao Long, could mean anything. But, so far, she’d been getting all of this extremely right. And that actually raised a question.

“Yang, didn’t you tell me that you didn’t really have experience with dating?”

“ _Dating_ , no, not a clue! _Dates_ are different, though! I went on a bunch before Beacon, trying to figure out what the fuss was about. But nothing, or nobody, I guess, really grabbed me, so they were one-off experiences. They never really made the jump into a relationship.”

And, there it was. The first awkward pause of the night. Yang seemed to flush, embarrassed, her eyes flicking to her empty plate. Blake didn’t blame her; she herself was busy pondering the same question as Yang: _will this one?_ But at least Yang had a reason to wonder. She may be worried about being too pushy, but both of them knew what she wanted. The question was Blake. It’d been three days now that she’d know her partner’s feelings, and that whole time, Blake couldn’t help but think about what she was putting her best friend through. _This must be killing her_. _No._ I _must be killing her._ Yang had made it clear that she should take her time, but this…it didn’t feel right. But what other option was there? She just wanted to be _sure_ , she wanted to _know_ she wasn’t going to hurt Yang again, if they did this. And even on top of that, there was a layer of absurdity to the situation she hadn’t yet come to terms with.

She never, _ever_ , thought she’d have to worry about breaking somebody’s heart.

“Blake?” The faunus started, shaken from her reverie by her date, offering her one of the mints the waiter had left after they’d paid. Blake took it, gladly – no matter how delicious it was, shrimp and garlic did not for pleasant breath make. “There is still that place, if you want to go?” Yang was smiling, but clearly nervous, trying to pave over the difficult moment. Blake wasn’t about to leave her wondering, not about this. They’d agreed to the date, and it may be her best chance to figure herself out, besides. And Yang hadn’t steered her wrong yet. That steak really had been something. And the truth was, even if it hadn’t been?

She would’ve eaten the whole damn thing to make Yang happy.

“Of course,” she said, smiling encouragingly. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”

\--------------------------

“Wow.”

That was a good sign. Yang glanced furtively over at Blake. Again. Her eyes were supposed to be on the moonlit river beneath the bridge they stood on, the shadows of the trees making ethereal shapes in the silvery light. And she could’ve come up with a dozen lines about how Blake was more beautiful than any river, any ocean, how everything else sometimes just faded away when she looked at the black-haired girl next to her, but that wouldn’t have been honest (in this particular moment). Really, she just wanted to know if Blake liked it.

“So…on a scale of one to park, where are you at right now? Because there are parks, if you wanted?”

Blake was silent for a long time. When she spoke, it was slow, and deliberate, but soft – almost like a trance.

“When I was little, my mom, would take me to a bridge like this. Not often. But when Dad had a meeting somewhere and she knew it would be especially hard for him, she’d take me to wait for him by the river near our house. It wasn’t even that close, really, but we went there anyway, even though it was always past my bedtime. And I don’t think it was close to him usually, either. Sometimes he probably went really out of his way to meet us. It was just…a special place. Somewhere we could just be a family. He was never mad to see me out of bed, even when it got near midnight. And I never fell asleep waiting for him, no matter how tired I got. I’d wait for him to get there, and then he’d pick me up, and I’d fall asleep in his arms as he carried me back to the house.”

Yang waited, barely aware that she was holding her breath. She let it out, slowly, and after a minute, decided that Blake was either lost in memories, or had nothing more to say. She risked it.

“So…does that mean it’s good?”

Blake let out a small laugh, turning to her with dry, but emotion-filled eyes. “It means it’s perfect.”

Yang couldn’t help but laugh. She was just…happy. Even with everything. Even knowing that, before too long, Ozpin and Qrow would return from their scouting and they’d be on the move again. Right here, right now, she felt like herself, with someone she seemed to actually be making feel good, and that was cause for a little joy. She grinned widely at Blake.

“So, am I reading this wrong, or am I kind of nailing this whole “Blake’s first date” thing?”

Blake laughed, a full, genuine laugh. She returned the blonde’s smile, tilting her head, almost like she was evaluating how best to answer.

“Yeah,” she said. And Yang felt a tingle, not a full feeling, just the sensors that provided haptic feedback for her right arm. She looked down, and there, entwined amongst her black and yellow fingers, were Blake’s own, pale and slender, tightening slightly as the faunus finished speaking.

“You really kind of are.”

\--------------------------

“Weeeeeiiiiss, I can’t take it anymore! I need to know! I’m gonna ask Yang.”

“Ruby, if you touch that scroll, I will – ”

“Tie me to the bed?” All of a sudden, Ruby had stopped her incessant pacing – if practically running in circles counted as pacing at all – and was grinning wickedly at Weiss, who now found herself annoyed _and_ flustered, which just increased her previous annoyance.

“No, I will remind you that doing so deprives the two of them of the alone time they desperately need to figure things out. Or have you forgotten?” Her right eyebrow arched, perfectly and imperiously, which was (she conceded), maybe a little much. Ruby would never willingly interfere with her sister’s happiness, so framing it like a direct assault on that very thing probably stung, but honestly, what other options did she have?

Well…

_NO._

She shook her head, clearing her mind. “Ruby, I’m sorry, but it’s not even nine o’clock yet. I’d be shocked if they get out of the restaurant before eight, so there’s probably still a while to go.”

“Yeah…I guess you’re right. You usually are.” Ruby’s eyes and protruding tongue made it distinctly clear that her statement was not intended as a compliment. Still, the smaller girl – or at least the younger, Weiss had been trying very hard not to compare their heights lately – seemed to relent, returning to her comic book and leaving Weiss, finally, to her own reading – in which was hidden her scroll, playing some barbaric but admittedly enjoyable game about connecting bubbles with the same type of dust in them. But, alas, her razor-focus went scarcely three minutes before being interrupted.

“Hey, Weiss?”

“Yes, Ruby?”

“Who do you think is going to top?”

Weiss could absolutely not believe it. “ _Excuse_ me?”

“When they start – I mean, _if_ they start – doing…y’know…sex?”

Weiss rose from her bed, each movement carefully planned and perfectly positioned to instill the greatest possible amount of fear in the young girl lying on her stomach on the floor, and her voice was frosty as first snow.

“Ruby. The two people on that date right now are currently deciding something incredibly important to them. They have to figure out what they need in a world that’s growing increasingly indifferent to their desires. Moreover, they’re our closest friends, one of whom is your sister, I might add. Should they, as you say, start _‘doing sex,’_ it will be _their_ business, and I will not, under _any_ circumstances, be speculating upon the nature of their physical relations. Do I make myself perfectly clear?”

Ruby was practically buried by backing into her cloak, penned in the corner by a woman who seemed twice the size of the ice knight she could summon. “Yep! Yep! Totally clear, sorry!”

Weiss let out a long, slow breath through her nose, and returned to her “reading.” Before too long, she’d missed half a dozen in a row. And suddenly, the screen was full, and she’d lost, and her focus was so far gone it took another moment for it to sink it.

_…shit._

“Yang,” she sighed. Ruby was already jumping up, as if she’d known. _She probably did, the conniver._

“See, I think it’ll be Blake! Because Blake’s all into the ribbons and, y’know, the bondage stuff?”

“What? Ruby, how could you possibly know that?” Ruby shrugged.

“She leaves her books lying around and they’re where I got, like, half my ideas from?” Ruby’s half-grin, sheepish but pleased with herself, was endearing as ever. “Besides, Blake’s kind of a control freak!”

“Not a bad argument, but I have…certain tendencies towards that, myself, and we still switch regularly! Besides, Yang’s going to want to fight for it, and in a, ah, _grappling_ contest, I don’t see her losing.”

“You wanna bet?” The former heiress shook her head.

“Bet with what, Ruby? It’s not like I have money anymore, and I’m fairly certain you didn’t take up robbery in the last day or so.”

Ruby shrugged. “Yeah, so?” And then it was back, that endearing, mischievous smile. “I wasn’t talking about betting money.”

“What? …oh. OH!” Weiss was flushed, cheeks almost warm, even, at least by her standards. This constant whiplash was a never-ending byproduct of dating Ruby. She could be adorable at one moment, naïve the next, and then smoldering, all before she’d finished her sentence. Someday, she’d have to figure out how to handle all that, since it might never change. Weiss wondered how much of it was her personality, and how much of it was the final, dying throes of puberty releasing their hold on her beloved.

But whichever it was, it seemed like a restful evening was rapidly becoming out of the question.

…maybe she’d talk to Blake and Yang in the morning.

\--------------------------

It was hours after dark by the time they arrived back at the house, walking the pathway to the door, but Blake’s scroll only read a little after ten. The seasons were turning, and the days shortening accordingly.

It reminded Blake of the passing time, and she didn’t care for it.

She’d hoped this would be it. That after days of her friend’s agony, she could pinpoint her feelings and finally let her know, one way or the other. But it had just muddied the waters.

It had been a wonderful evening, talking, relaxing, not worrying…or, well, at least worrying less. It had felt natural, normal, nothing forced, just…them. Together. And that’s what scared her. The more time they spend together, the more Blake felt like maybe, just maybe…that was where they were supposed to be. And that thought alone was frightening enough, because what does that even _mean_ in their situation, but…it wasn’t even that. It was that the more she wanted this, the less certain she was she wouldn’t hurt Yang. The guilt still haunted her, and no matter how much Yang reassured her, she felt like it always would. Living through that again seemed impossible. And that was just for her, for guilt for actions she chose to take, what about Yang? What about the one those actions really affected, what about the one who’d never deserved the pain and hurt that she’d suffered in life? What if something happened, and it broke her?

_Is this…power? Is this what Adam felt over me, knowing he could manipulate and use me and break me to pieces if he wanted? Is that why he did it, because he liked feeling this way? Like my fate, my emotions, were in his hands?_

_…maybe it was. Then thank you, Adam, for one last lesson._

\--------------------------

At last, it was over. They’d reached the door, and on the whole, Yang thought it had actually gone…kind of amazing? She didn’t want to jinx anything yet, she knew that with her immense Xiao Long sense of impeccably poor timing she might still screw something up, but right now, she was thrilled, and not just because they’d been holding hands since the bridge. Whatever happened going forward, that had been the best date of her life. _Probably always will be_. She’d dreamt of this, and while it never looked this way in her head, this was even better.

For the first time in longer than she could remember, she felt like she’d done something right. She hadn’t let anyone down.

She turned to her date, beautiful in her blue-and-gold dress, and smiled wide. “Well, Miss Belladonna, how would you say your first date went?”

Blake’s eyes were bright. There was something behind them…anxiety, maybe, or worry? But the way they shone…

“I’d love to answer, Miss Xiao Long, but I didn’t think it was over yet?”

Yang frowned a little at that. Had something gone wrong and she hadn’t even noticed? “I don’t think I forgot anything – all the classics, right?”

“You promised me all of them, but didn’t we miss one?” Blake stepped forward. Yang really, really hoped there wasn’t about to be some sort of telling off for something obvious. She wracked her brain, but it came up empty.

“Uh, I’m sorry, what is it?” And now, the faunus was standing before her, face to face.

“I thought there was supposed to be a goodnight kiss?”

Yang froze. And Yang imploded.

Her body didn’t register, couldn’t move, like all her senses had shut down, to contain the wave of heat and fear and shock and desire and excitement that flooded through every vein. She could practically feel her body working overtime to start functioning again. Her head began to clear, slightly, just enough to remain coherent.

“Blake – ”

But then Blake was there. And there was only her.

Blake’s lips pressed against her own, firm and sure and welcoming, the smell of her hair filling Yang’s nostril as the breeze sent it her way, Blake’s fingers on either side of her neck cooling her burning skin as Yang’s own were suddenly, desperately on her back, holding her close, and Blake was all she was tasting, touching, _breathing –_

And then it was over. Yang couldn’t hear, her heart was pounding in her ears like a goliath’s march, but Blake, Blake was still there, heads pressed together, hands unmoving, and she was speaking, soft and swift and earnest.

“Yang, I might hurt you. I might, and I’ll never want to, but I might anyway. I’ve been so scared, so _fucking_ scared, of that. I was so confused, and the longer we spent, the clearer it became I wanted this, I wanted to try, but I was a coward. I couldn’t commit to that because I thought I might hurt you, but I could never be sure I wouldn’t, it was just holding me back, and you don’t deserve that. And I…I don’t think I deserve that, either. So, I can’t promise I won’t hurt you, I can’t even promise that we won’t…that we won’t break up, but I can promise that I’ll never, ever want to, and I can promise that I’ll never, ever leave you, Yang, not again. Even if someday we aren’t… _together_ together, you’ll never be alone. I knew I couldn’t make your choices for you, Yang, but part of me tried anyway, and I never, _ever_ want something I’m holding over you. You don’t have to convince me, you don’t have to get me to stay. We’re equal in this, always, no matter how it started. I’m making my own choice, too, now. This, you, _us_ , that’s what I want, Yang. So…what do you want?”

Yang’s heart was in her throat. She’d started crying, and doubted she’d stop any time soon. But she held Blake tight, and she pulled her even closer. Even whispered, Yang’s voice was as shaky and watery as she’d ever heard it. “Didn’t you listen, Blake? I told you. I promised.”

“You’re never the wrong choice.”

Yang didn’t know how long they stood that way, outside the door, crying together. Eventually, Blake’s head found a resting place against Yang’s heart, face to face with her hands on Yang’s chest. Yang just held her tightly. The moon was well past its height when Blake spoke again, barely a murmur.

“I’m sorry that I’m not ready to say it yet…but I’m ready to hear it. You don’t have to, just…if you want to.”

And Yang just hugged her tighter, nestling into Blake’s hair to whisper in her faunus ears.

_“I love you, Blake Belladonna."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boy, this one was a long time coming, huh?
> 
> There are a few factors in the timing, really. Part of it started with a series of busy weeks. Some of it had to do with working on my own project. There was even a bit where I wondered if I would bother now that the new season was coming out - I wasn't sure people would want to read something that didn't fit with the canon (although I'm currently saying this all takes place between the volumes anyway). Not to mention that I wanted it to be good, of course, which I think I managed at least 65%.
> 
> But, the truth is, mental health has been even harder than usual lately. And that, more than anything, put me where I am. But today, for the first time in months, I felt this calling. So I sat down instead of going to bed, wrote and revised for four long hours, and here it is. It feels damn good.
> 
> I can't promise any kind of schedule or consistency to this, if I'm honest. I have to prioritize my own well-being. But there'll be more, sooner or later. And while you're waiting, I hear a couple of writers down in Austin, Texas have their own story about these characters they're telling right now. Probably worth checking out.
> 
> Cheers, friends, and enjoy!  
> 12AngryHighlanders


	10. Chapter 10

They crept inside, careful not to wake anyone. Yang even managed to be moderately stealthy, which was no small feat for her. Blake risked a glance at the nearest clock. Just after one in the morning. Not too late for a good night’s rest, if she was willing to sleep in a little. With how exhausting – good, but exhausting – everything had been, she didn’t see a problem with that. Once divested of their shoes, she took Yang’s hand in hers, leading her partner quietly to the door of her room. The blonde’s tears had dried, as had her own, but it still felt like the smallest push could send them right back over the edge. All the same, Yang smiled at her, teasing.

“You know, I’ve never let someone take me home after a first date.” Blake almost rolled her eyes, but somehow, it just came out as a small,  _very_ un-Blake-like giggle.

“We live in the same house, Yang.”

“Still counts!” Again, Blake attempted to dismiss the joke, this time with a shake of her head. But her body betrayed her again, and she found herself hugging Yang, head on her chest.

“Thank you.” Her voice wasn’t even a whisper. Barely a murmur. She knew Yang had heard, though, by the tightening of her arms around Blake. There was a moment’s pause, as though Yang was thinking it through, before Blake felt soft lips pressed to her forehead.

“What for?” Her partner’s voice was almost as soft as hers, her tone so familiar that Blake could practically hear the slight, confused frown.

“For not giving up on me.” She didn’t know why she hadn’t said it sooner. It hadn’t even crossed her mind. But after everything tonight, it seemed like the most obvious thing in the world. Yet she felt Yang stiffen slightly.

“…Yes, I did.” Her voice was soft, still, but pained. Guilty. “You shouldn’t be thanking me, Blake…I didn’t want to, but I was in a dark place, and…and I did. It killed me, but I honestly thought I’d never see you again. I thought that if you left when you did, when I needed you most, that…that there was never a time you’d be there. And when you did come back, I knew you didn’t mean to. That it was just…well, not coincidence, exactly, but not on purpose. I thought you’d leave again. And then even when you stayed, I didn’t think you  _cared_. I never stopped loving you, Blake, but I did give up on you, more than once, and I’m so, so sorry.” Though she couldn’t see, it was obvious Yang was trying to keep tears from spilling over.

Part of Blake was crushed. How could she not be, after hearing that? She’d never been close to anyone the way she was to Yang, and even after she’d run in the days following the Fall of Beacon, she’d still sort of thought that Yang would just always be there. Even if Blake could never see her again. It was stupid and selfish and completely unfair, but she’d never considered anything else.

Part of her was overcome by guilt, the same guilt she’d been feeling for so long, the guilt she wasn’t sure would ever completely leave her. Logically she knew that Yang had forgiven her. Or mostly forgiven her, anyway. But she was far from forgiving herself. When Yang had told her how she felt, Blake’s guilt had only increased. Now that she knew how she felt in return, there was a completely different layer to the guilt. One that cursed her for all the time she missed during which they could’ve been together the way they were tonight.

But part of her…part of her was even more grateful. Confusingly, paradoxically grateful. Because what Yang said meant something, something that was, in many ways, more important than never giving up on Blake. It meant that Yang had given her another chance. More than just one. It meant that, despite everything, Yang had never hated her. Blake had seen hate firsthand, and you didn’t try so hard for someone you couldn’t stand. Someone you didn’t truly want to be with, if only they’d realize and want to be with you in return.

So, she hugged Yang tighter, and whispered back. “Oh, Yang…I don’t blame you. I mean,” she chuckled, her own eyes watery, “I am a little hopeless. You called me a lost cause the first day we met.” Yang actually laughed a little, really more of a snort.

“You heard that?”

Blake wiggled her faunus ears, tickling beneath Yang’s chin, the other girl squirming and even letting out a soft giggle.

“You didn’t know back then just how good my hearing was.” She smiled, and then let out a long breath. “Yang, I mean it…if you’ve loved me all this time…” She shook her head. “I wouldn’t have wanted to count on me, either. And you always tried so hard to let me back in. So, I guess, thank you for giving up on me a bunch of times, but always letting me try again. Just let my thank you be for that?”

Her partner drew a shaky breath, but slowly nodded. “Yeah…yeah, I guess I can see my way to that.” Blake gave her a squeeze.

“So, we should get some rest.” She hesitated. “Yang, do you, maybe, you know…want to sleep in my room? In the bed this time?” Yang pulled back giving her an almost frightened look.

“Are you sure, Blake? I mean, really, I know this is new, and it’s been so tough for you the past few days, would it be too much?” Blake gave a small shake of her head. She’d been putting her partner, her best friend, the girl she now realized she wanted to be more than friends with, through hell, and all Yang could think about was taking care of her.

“I’m sure.” She wanted to say more, but wasn’t sure what, so she just tried to put as much caring as she could into those two words. Yang ran her mechanical hand over her eyes and back through her hair.

“I should say no,” she whispered. “I should say that we should get rest and have some time to ourselves to just process, you know?” She looked towards the floor, then up again, lilac eyes shining with emotion as they met Blake’s own amber ones. “But  _shit_ , Blake, I’m not that strong.”                                                                  

Blake brushed a strand of hair from her partner’s eyes, and slowly, carefully, leaned in to place a soft kiss on Yang’s lips.

“You don’t have to be,” her quiet voice insisted. “Nobody can be as strong as you are all the time. I want to do this, so if you do, too, then just trust me.”

Yang nodded. “I always do.”

Blake pulled her partner into the bedroom, although the blonde left quickly, realizing she had no pajamas and promising to be back fast. Meanwhile, Blake carefully began to undress. Beautiful as her dress was, she would’ve been lying if she said she wasn’t desperate to get into something more comfortable. She hoped Yang would knock – they’d watched each other change at Beacon, but this was different. Intimate. Someday, she wanted to do this for Yang. But this wasn’t the night for it.

When her partner returned, she did knock, although Blake was already in her own sleepwear by then. Yang had changed before returning, so she could hang her own dress up. They clambered under the covers, and while the bed was a little too small, they managed to find a comfortable position, Blake’s head lying against Yang’s chest. They were falling asleep almost instantly, the fatigue finally catching up with them.

“Thanks,” Yang murmured, almost asleep already. What the blonde was thanking her for, she didn’t know, and asking for clarification was beyond Blake’s ability right now. So, she just yawned, hugged her partner tighter, and let herself rest.

\--------------------------

When Blake awoke, she was alone. Glancing at the time, she realized it was well after nine. Her bed was still warm, and smelling of Yang. She smiled. If Yang was gone, and it was this late, that could only mean one thing: breakfast.

Blake stretched, painfully aware of just how cat-like the motion was, and clambered to her feet. Slipping on her regular clothes, she felt her own stomach rumble. Food was rapidly becoming a necessity. And tea. Dust, she needed her morning tea.

She padded out to the kitchen, surprised to find Weiss sitting there, sipping coffee, rather than her…damn it, she didn’t really know what to call her. Girlfriend? It felt accurate, but…reductive. And they’d never explicitly talked about it. Immaterial of that, however, she had to actually find her partner. Weiss turned to look at her, unspeaking, eyes curious but not prying. Blake and Yang would have to talk with her and Ruby, but it didn’t feel right to it without everyone present. So instead, she just responded with her own questioning look.

“Yang?” The ghost of a smile flitted across the former heiress’ face and she nodded to a large stack of dirty plates in the sink.

“Your hurricane of a partner came through here, cleaned out the last of the breakfast food, and said to let you know she’d be training. Ruby, Ren, Nora, and Jaune all went shopping but were wise enough not to make me come before my coffee.”

“Which cup?”

“Fourth. Last night was…tiring.”

Blake smiled, but didn’t say anything. Weiss was being very restrained, and teasing would’ve been a poor way to repay that. “Thanks, I’ll go find her.”

Weiss nodded. Blake was almost out the door before her teammate spoke up.

“Blake?” The faunus turned to look. Weiss was hesitant, clearly reluctant to risk upsetting some delicate, invisible balance. “Good or bad?”

Blake paused, feeling a blush creeping up her face. She couldn’t help but notice a shy grin overtaking her.

“Good.”

Weiss nodded, triumph in her eyes, a satisfied “hmph!” her only indication of her feelings. Blake hurried to find her partner.

They’d manage to mostly soundproof the training room, but Blake was still a decent distance away when the muffled reports of shotgun blasts reached her ears. She carefully opened the door, not wanting to disturb her partner.

The room wasn’t large, and certainly not big enough for Yang’s usual regimen. There was a punching bag hooked up in the middle of the room, and Yang danced around it, blanks in her weapons providing propulsion when necessary without the obvious drawbacks of live ammunition. Blake could tell she’d altered her fighting style for the room, even her shotgun-assisted leaps reigned in enough to fit the tighter quarters.

Blake found herself mesmerized. She’d seen Yang fight more times than she could count, and Yang was just wearing her usual training outfit of an orange tank top and loose black pants. But Blake rarely stopped to truly watch, to take in the heavy but measured breathing of her partner, or the sheen of sweat as she fought her phantom opponent. And there was no denying that Yang was  _better_  than she had been, too. Her strikes were more controlled, her movements more careful. It wasn’t caution, or hesitation, more like careful, calculated reservation. Aggressive, but refined. But none of that was what truly impressed Blake. It was just that it had been so long, she’d almost forgotten.

Because Ruby was the fastest of them, the best shot, with easily the deadliest weapon. Weiss had glyphs, summons, and skill with dust, all of which let her perform almost magical feats the others could never match. Blake herself was the stealthiest, the most agile, and if she let humility go, the cleverest fighter amongst them.

But if you needed someone to go in with everything they had, if you needed someone whose strength was unmatched and her tenacity unwavering, if you needed someone who you could send into a fight and trust that they would certainly, unequivocally,  _win_?

You sent Yang Xiao Long.

Blake’s eyes followed in rapt attention, her own breathing growing shallow just watching, a mix of inspiration and admiration washing over her. She was a potent fighter herself, and maybe it was just because of how different their styles of combat were, but the dance of battle she was watching right now truly impressed her. She knew everyone on their team had small envies of the others’ abilities, and this was hers. Plus, truthfully?

It was pretty fucking sexy.

Eventually, with one last, powerful blow punctuated with a yell, the bag barely managing neither to split nor go flying, it was over. Yang was sweating, exhausted, but she turned to look at Blake and gave her nothing but the most genuine smile.

“Hey.”

And Blake was  _on_ her, kissing her, hands tangled in her blonde mane, feeling Yang’s surprise, and then desire as her arms gripped Blake’s back, pressing her into the kiss. When they finally broke, Blake’s eyes were half-lidded, and she was breathing hard enough that she felt like she’d undergone the training herself. Yang was flushed, an almost goofy grin on her face, looking at Blake with a level of caring that made her shiver.

“So…good morning.”

“Good morning,” Blake managed to whisper breathlessly. “I’m sorry, I mean, we should talk more about…everything, but I was watching you, and…yeah.” She’d separated from Yang, right hand gripped firmly on her upper left arm. Yang nodded, and Blake could tell that despite her thrilled look, there was something else on her mind, too.

“For sure, I’ve just gotta shower, but I’ll be back in a few minutes? Your room?” Blake nodded, and even knowing that there were very real conversations to be had, couldn’t help but smile as Yang hesitantly, as if frightened of scaring her off, leaned in to place a soft kiss on her cheek and jogged towards the shower.

\--------------------------

When Yang was finished, she made a beeline for Blake’s room. She’d barely been able to soap herself down; her hand had kept going unconsciously to her lips, tracing the kiss over them again and again. It was still hard to believe it was real. There was so much to figure out – talking to Ruby and Weiss was going to be huge even if there had been nothing else – but she couldn’t help it.

She was so damn happy.

Or…mostly.

She put those thoughts from her mind as she slid into her partner’s room. Blake smiled as she entered, beckoning Yang to take a seat on the bed with her. She was more than happy to oblige. Blake leaned in, giving her a soft kiss. She sighed into it. She was grateful. Blake seemed to understand that at first, it would be…difficult for her to initiate things like that. Her grasp on it all was so tenuous. She was so scared this morning, even compared to her worries over the past few days, that now that they were finally,  _finally_  together, that she’d do something to push her partner away.

And a small, cruel part of her wasn’t even convinced Blake would be here tomorrow.

They separated slowly, and Blake looked at her for a long moment before speaking. She seemed to struggle with the words, like there was something that needed saying, but she didn’t want to say it.

“Yang…is something wrong?” Well, shit, that wasn’t how she’d wanted to start this off. But the way she was feeling, of course she hadn’t been able to mask it fully. Not from Blake. She opened her mouth to deflect the question, but she didn’t get the chance. “I want to know.” Blake’s eyes were earnest, concerned. So, Yang closed her mouth, and nodded, eyes down.

“Did…did I do something?” She looked up in shock, her dark-haired partner no longer meeting her gaze.

“What?  _No_ , dust, Blake, no, I promise.” She’d grabbed Blake’s hands in her own, and when Blake looked up again, she smiled for a brief moment.

“Thank you.”

Yang squeezed her hands. “Blake, it’s not like that. It’s more just…I woke up this morning feeling like something was wrong. It wasn’t you, not at all. Waking up next to you…that meant more than I can tell you. But I got up, ate, brushed my teeth, and the whole time there was something gnawing at me, some sort of anxiety. And I was so  _frustrated_  because I just couldn’t figure it out, but training always helps me clear my head.”

She ran a hand through her hair, a habit that always reared its head when she was annoyed with herself. “Shit, I don’t know how to explain it.” She felt a squeeze on the hand that was still holding Blake’s. The faunus’ other hand now covered it, and she was giving Yang a gentle nod of encouragement. Even a small smile. Dust, what a beautiful smile. Yang returned the smile, silently grateful.  _Thank you_ , she thought.  _Thank you for knowing I’m not as good at this as you are. Words don’t come easy, although a little better than they used to._  She took a shaky breath, steadying herself.

“It’s like…I woke up this morning so  _happy_ , and there was a part of me that kept telling myself that I wasn’t  _supposed_ to be. Not like I shouldn’t have been happy about what happened because I really,  _really_  am, but more like…like being happy was inviting something dangerous. Because every time I’ve been the happiest, something goes wrong. Someone gets hurt, or leaves, or…” She gritted her teeth, willing herself not to cry. “…or dies. And it felt like I shouldn’t be risking that by trying to be happy, and it felt like I was weak for letting somebody else be the one to make me happy. Like I was fucking pathetic for needing anyone else because haven’t I learned better by now?” She was getting angry now, her voice rising, she could tell. But she couldn’t stop at, and with the anger all directed at herself, she didn’t want to. “And I couldn’t believe I was stupid enough to try and make something work, because things will go wrong and it’ll kill me inside and I’ll be lucky if it doesn’t get someone else killed for real and –”

“Yang.” Blake’s voice cut through her tirade, soft but insistent. “Your eyes.”

Yang blinked. Tears threatened to spill over, but it wasn’t that. She could always tell, if she was paying attention, when her soft purple eyes had turned red. She closed them, hard, desperately trying to get herself under control.

And then she felt Blake’s arms around her shoulders, pulling Yang’s head to her chest. And tears leaked from her eyes, still squeezed shut. But when she opened them, they were violet again. She sniffled.

“I’m sorry, I can’t believe I finally woke up in your bed and now I’m crying like an idiot.”

Blake laughed a little, but followed it with a small shushing noise. “You aren’t an idiot, Yang…it’s okay…”

Yang spoke into her chest. “I think…I think I’m still not right. I’d hoped I was, but I was scared I wasn’t, and it turns out I’m not. This just happens sometimes, I’ll suddenly be on edge, where anything could set me off, and this, today…it feels so shitty, but it still could’ve been so much worse.” Blake just nodded silently, kissing Yang’s hair before she spoke.

“What can I do? What do you need?” Yang almost shrugged, but took a moment. What  _did_  she need?

“I think,” she said slowly, “that I need to figure out how to be me again. I’ve spent so much time just trying to find all of you, and Weiss gave me some really good advice about all this – I know, I can’t believe it either – but I’m still not okay with myself. So much of what I want is just to be with you all, and it fucking hurts, but I think one of those stupid fucking voices in my head is  _right_. I can’t have my only happiness come from you, or Weiss, or even  _Ruby_ , I…I need to be able to be happy with me.” Her stomach felt leaden, because even as she was saying it, it felt awful, like some sort of dismissal of how happy she was with Blake and how complete she finally felt, and she was sure it was going to push Blake away, and she’d  _just_ fucking been able to really be with her…

But it didn’t. Blake nodded softly, pulling away to caress Yang’s cheek.

“Yang,” she said gently, “I understand that more than you know. After I left the White Fang, before I met…well, even a little while after I met all of you, all I wanted was to be on my own. Find a little peace with myself and my books. But it wasn’t good for me. It almost took me apart and I didn’t even realize it. I  _needed_  to not be alone, even if I didn’t want it. And I know you don’t want it, I promise I do, but…that doesn’t mean you don’t need to learn how you  _can_  be alone and still be at least a little happy with yourself.” She pressed another soft kiss to Yang’s lips, and Yang felt her whole body shudder as tension left it. “But you don’t have to hate yourself to do it. And you don’t have to deal with it on your own.” Her lips quirked up in a smile. “We can help you learn how to be alone. Together.”

Yang laughed. A small, watery laugh, but a laugh nonetheless. Her happiness had always come from freedom and the people she loved. But if learning to be a little happier with who she was on her own would quiet the voices, then it was worth it. And she wouldn’t have to actually  _be_  alone to do it.

She trembled, and even with everything, she still felt so scared. But she braced herself, and slowly brought her lips to Blake’s. Afraid at first, but when Blake didn’t pull away, when Blake kissed her back, well…

There was no feeling in the fucking world like that one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, everyone! So, I've actually been sitting on this for a little while. I wanted to wait to post it until after the finale this weekend, wait to see what happened. Then I sort of remembered today that I can just update these notes after it comes out and it will have the exact same effect. So, sorry about that, should've posted this sooner! But guys, seriously...we are so damn close. It could not be more implicit that Bumbleby is really, genuinely canon. I still need explicit confirmation, which I really hope we get in the finale, but for the first time in basically ever I don't just hope, but actually believe that this will happen. Holy fucking shit.
> 
> Edit: Well, the finale was a bit short and abrupt for my taste, but still by far one of the best two volumes (I need to rewatch three again to compare). However, on Bumbleby specifically, I'm mostly annoyed that they're being AS GAY AS POSSIBLE without actually confirming it. That being said, the writers aren't stupid enough not to realize how these things come across, and not cruel enough to not pay them off. Even though I won't really be able to believe it until I see it, I think the signs are very, very promising, and I'm mostly annoyed I can't just go into hibernation until volume seven.


End file.
